this post was submitted on 12 Sep 2024
814 points (98.6% liked)

Programmer Humor

19702 readers
114 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
814
There are only two states (programming.dev)
submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by AlexKochetkova to c/programmer_humor
 
all 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 47 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Very binary, much wow.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago (1 children)

With quantum computers you can become a god that doesn't know what it's doing. πŸ˜ƒ

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

You don’t need quantum computers for that.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 2 months ago (2 children)

This tracks with my assessment of the two likely personalities of software engineers, either narcissistic or anxious with imposter syndrome.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Both at once all the time ?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Not at the same time, but in alternation, sure. It's all reactions to underlying shame and inadequacy beliefs/feelings which are there all the time I expect.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I disagree: as a Bachus of Programming I have successfully managed to at the same time both be a God of Programming AND having no clue what's going on.

(The real joke behind the joke is that today I'm doing Shader programming so that's quite close to reality and I could definitelly do with large amounts of wine or at least beer).

[–] MajorHavoc 1 points 2 months ago

Good assessment. And most of us are both.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty firmly in the second category only. I have had the first a few times, but when whatever thing you were so stoked about inevitably fries or fails a few weeks in, you quickly learn to stop doing #1 altogether.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

s/"a god"/"finished for the day"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

It do be like that

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago

Here too the SchrΓΆdinger's equations apply: a programmer's state during coding is a superposition of both of these states until actually trying to run the code, at which point it collapses into one of the two states.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago (2 children)

That’s not true, there is a third state:

β€œI don’t care anymore, I’ll drive Uber if it comes to that”.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

4th state: I don't care, I just use AI to write my code.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

The trick there is that you'll be developing forever unless you get your hands dirty, because it like 80% works, and you need 99% to put it in any kind of prod.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Have you seen how American corps code? 80% is GM release ready to go.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Honestly I've never had the displeasure. Or financial benefit.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)
  • Start working in morning - Photo 2
  • Take a break and come back - Photo 1
  • flow state
  • Come back next day - Photo 2
  • The saga continues... (Wu tang, Wu tang)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Tell that to Microsoft!

bool?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

i am a god who has no idea what they're doing πŸ₯Ί

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

Programmers have it so easy nowadays.

You should try programming in BASIC on the Atari.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Isn't that first artwork from the Atari BASIC book cover? I suffered enough with BASIC on my TI-99 and IBM XT, I can't imagine how rough the Atari version was.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Basic on commodore or turbo pascal on the icon, my first programming languages. Just started learning C++, shoulda started this 30 years ago

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Turbo Pascal was great and a big step up over what you could do with BASIC. Good luck with C++.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Thanks, and yes it was

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Man I love that old Atari art.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

The more time a coder spends in #2, the more I trust them.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

I would say there are two types of devs.

The HACKER MAN knowing everything, always have the only solution and being boss in their realm

The DAUBTER thinking they know too less, always searching for the best solution for the problem and trying to get as many information to solve the problem as possible


Even having the imposter syndrome as a big problem for mental health. I genuinely have the opinion it makes the better devs.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

There's a third state: "Where's the documentation on how to do , so I don't have to steal it from a GPL code?"

[–] RustyShackleford 1 points 2 months ago

Immo stultorum deus sum.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

I am a god because it works but I have no idea why it works