this post was submitted on 26 Sep 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 255 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

He sucked 100 dicks and with that knowledge and experience in the end he finally chose hers.

Remember that.

[–] [email protected] 75 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Either way I feel it's more important how many dicks they sucked after entering the relationship.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I personally don't want to know about before and won 't ask, but that's up to everyone's personal relationship standards.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (8 children)

My wife and I were both open about ours, and being open about it made trusting easier. I'm not sure who would have an problem knowing approximate numbers unless they have jealousy issues or are judgy.

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago

When you're bi curious, but you also respect the scientific method and so you require a large sample size to make an informed decision.

[–] [email protected] 155 points 1 month ago (6 children)
[–] [email protected] 93 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Try not to suck any dick on the way through the parking lot!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 month ago

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

It's written almost as if he did it the night before the wedding, which would be an impressive trick for a bachelor party.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Just bring her lasagna at work. She'll get over it.

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[–] [email protected] 86 points 1 month ago (4 children)

It's not dick sucking quantity that matters, but dick sucking quality

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago

"I swear I really went for it, babe. I was buckling knees..."

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Hard disagree. It's about optimizing the dick sucking.

I'm betting if you line three guys into a triangle, you can suck three dicks at once.

This will allow you hit 99 dicks in only 33 sucking motions.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Yeah if you have a jaw that can be unhinged like a snake.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Quantity has a quality all its own. Jumps into pile of dicks.

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He sucked their dicks, but did he suck their hearts?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He he he, first orgasm, then organ harvesting

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[–] [email protected] 57 points 1 month ago (3 children)

It’s surprisingly not that hard to put up those kinds of numbers. It does not matter your gender or physical appearance, you can find at least one hundred guys willing to let you suck their dick.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm afraid to test your theory.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If you do test their theory, get tested often.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (3 children)

My experience on Grindr says otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Sometimes you’ve gotta be brave enough to check out the blank profiles lol.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

When I first got together with my wife she insisted that neither of us share with each other of our past relationships or sexual experiences. I was fine with it because I always believed in the ignorance is bliss mantra for certain circumstances. After about a decade of marriage and a couple of kids she starts asking and stuff. I didn't really want to share but she told me about how she had a threesome while in college a couple of times. I did admit that I was a bit jealous. She also told me that she slept around a lot in college and that her count was like 50-60 she can't really remember. But then she asked about mine and that's when I told her about the escorts. That's when she got mad about me telling her about my past.

[–] [email protected] 104 points 1 month ago (4 children)

that’s when I told her about the escorts.

Jesus Christ, never admit that you drove a Ford.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

I mean... it's probably good to talk about these things before getting married, since it will inevitably lead to unresolved feelings later on. I wouldn't mind if, for instance, my partner was a slut while I was a sexless virgin before we got together, but I would at least want to know that about them. In my mind you're supposed to talk about your life experiences with your partner, and sex is falls under that umbrella. Idk, maybe I'm weird for thinking that.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (10 children)

As long as it wasn't in a row

[–] [email protected] 36 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Are you envisaging a sort of grid arrangement?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

No a spiral. Makes the ol’ suck and tug much easier.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

Sequential list, surely. Though maybe you could suck off the current and .next at the same time.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

What if was in a column?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Don't kink shame me!

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

She's just upset because her number is so low comparingly

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (3 children)

i just cant imagine giving a shit about this. like how insecure do you have to be after 16 years to care??

[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago (7 children)

The joke is after 16 years finding out your husband is into cock.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Well, I mean, as long as you made enough to afford the engagement ring.

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