this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 83 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Just last week, someone left a note for me saying I'm a "goddess among mortals" for making a carrot cake without raisins.

I'm an overweight 40-year-old man with a beard. She hadn't seen who made the cake, so she was just making a guess that the baker was a woman, but still. Funny experience.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago

Embrace the joy, Goddess.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago

I’m 38, male, chubby, can’t grow a beard for shit.

Raisins are wank. You’re “a goddess among mortals”.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

Who the fuck puts raisins in a carrot cake?
I have honestly never experienced an abomination. Not that there is anything wrong with raisins, but in carrot cake?

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

She is correct. You are absolutely divine for excluding raisins, you radiant goddess, you!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

Oh shit, you are a goddess among mortals! Carrot cake is one of my all time favorites so I keep trying it despite being disappointed every time that someone put raisins in it. It’s just mean.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

She's right. Cooked raisins are an abomination. You're a hero.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

"You eat rice like Chinese person"

From the lady behind the counter as I was watching some bullshit on my phone and eating mapo tofu

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

I'm not even sure what that could mean. Maybe using chopsticks instead of a fork? I've always just eaten food with whatever utensil is typically used for that type of cuisine. I think most people, Chinese or otherwise, eat Chinese food with chopsticks, don't they?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

I think it was that I had picked up the takeout container close to my face and was using the chopsticks to shovel rice into my maw as I watched some video.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

That I have a nice phone number.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

I have an evil one. It ends 666 👿

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

My old work number used to have a 404 area code. I work in tech. It was a fun inside joke.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

An ultrasound tech once told me that I have a cute spleen.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Nothing looks cute on an ultrasound. Humans are hardwired to see babies as cute, and even they don't look cute on an ultrasound.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago

So they gotta have one hell of a cutie spleen

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Several nurses have commented on my veins. Like to the point where I felt like I was getting hit on.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

My female colleague told me the other day I'd make a great dad because my tattoos are all black and white and that would be great for kids because they could color them.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

From my ENT: You've got a very well maintained nose.

Uhm, thanks?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

“I can tell you’re not a habitual cocaine user”

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

As I was sitting at my desk with some tea and a stroopwaffel, one of my coworkers commented that I "really knew how to live."

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago

"You like like a modern interpretation of some Greek god of spice" I had a spig of rosemary tucked behind my ear and a shirt that reads "why so salty"

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

"Whoever did your circumcision did a really good job." :/

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

I need more context 😭

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah. Let's see the model cock, sir

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Nurses tend to like the veins in my left arm so I've had a few comments on that.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Oh I get this one. It's usually along the lines of "the blood bank would love to have you" or even "I could find your veins blindfolded"

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Compared to pretty much every other response, this is real bland, but I recently had a librarian at the community college I attend tell me something like how my name is a nice name.

It's not a special name in any way, just a run-of-the-mill Biblical name tons of people have. For obvious reasons, I won't tell what it is, but this is the first time I've ever gotten a compliment about my name.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't know how weird it is but I've been told a few times that I have a "calming presence". It's a very nice compliment, just don't understand why or how.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

This is sometimes what happens when someone grows up around someone who is volatile or unpredictable.

Natural adaptation.

Could that be why?

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

"You have the most beautiful intestines!" And several other similar things as I was checked for cancer.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

It's like the saying goes: true beauty is on the inside.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I "chew sexy"....was eating pizza at a girlfriend's house.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

Being complimented by the urologist on my shaving for a vasectomy.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

First girl I ever kissed complimented me on my nice looking hands at the teenybopper bar. Weird at the time, took me a couple of decades to realize women look at our hands, think of us touching them.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

Irish people ask me what part of Ireland I’m from. I must do an amazing Irish accent despite being Scottish and have never visited there. I blame the fact that central Edinburgh doesn’t have a strong Scottish accent and lots of Londoners/Americans study here.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I was once told that I ‘look like I’m going to ask someone to the Sadie Hopkins dance’. I assume they just meant I looked nice/dressed up, but it just struck me as interesting phrasing. Random people just tend to talk to me; a couple weeks ago I was at the gas station and an older guy struck up a conversation and commented that it was nice to see someone smile ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

Sounds like they may have been referring to the "Sadie Hawkins dance" which is a middle school highschool dance where the girls ask the guys to be their date. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadie_Hawkins_dance

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I have the perfect hands to be a surgeon.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Her "you look like Kevin federline"

Me "well fuck you too"

Her "what?! He's hot!"

Me "I stand by my statement"

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

there was a comment thread where there was something along the lines of "when my roommate peed you could HEAR how his urethra was wider than a normal person" and I don't know how to feel about it

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

This is disturbing

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