Relevant XKCD : https://xkcd.com/859/
this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2025
195 points (93.0% liked)
Programmer Humor
20893 readers
1212 users here now
Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
Rules
- Keep content in english
- No advertisements
- Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
I work as an embedded developer and when a new board is produced and half tested, every one expects fully functional code off the bat, right away.
Motherfucker, you didn't even qualify your hardware and you expect my code, that hasn't hit the new board, to be 100% functional, based on your mind map? We will find hardware issues that will inevitably be blamed on the code and spend hours "debugging" the code to eventually find out the hardware is shit.
I thought the joke here was that your unbalanced parentheses would make me angry (they did))
... is that not the point of the title?
I clicked into the post expecting more text and then realized that was the joke.
Congrats OP, I am both upset and entertained!
I mean, the headline of this post already makes me irrationally angry. 😂
Y u no close brackets!?
I think that's the joke, Clyde!
I have this great idea for an app, we can go 70/30 on it! 70 for me because the idea is the hardest part after all. So basically it's Twitter plus Facebook plus Tinder with a built in MMO. You can get that done in a couple weeks, should be pretty easy right?
Tinder MMO huh? You may be onto something...
But, if you want my opinion, I want 15%
[Object object]
Actually it's [object Object]
Ah, piss. So it is.
I'm going to blame it on autocorrect, even though we both know I just got it wrong
load more comments
(1 replies)
Figure out if they prefer spaces or tabs, insist on the other.
Please note this won't work on Pythonistas as they've already had their spirit thoroughly broken.
A haiku for you:
Tabs or four spaces
Never a semicolon
Broken in spirit
I've only ever heard raging between the two, but never why. I'm guessing there were competing languages with different standards, or maybe historic hardware limiting input sets that kicked this debate off or?
A few languages force a decision (usually towards tabs), but otherwise it's just a question of aesthetics vs. accessibility.
I see.
My worst experience was with spaces in code from an engineering professor who used a non-monospace typefont. Sadist. Though it was comic sans, they were probably just dyslexic. Despite the class focusing on numerical methods, we had to hand write Matlab code on paper using proper syntax. I have no clue why. Never learned much numerical method, nor were we ever allowed to use Matlab except on a few "projects" during the term. I found out about the spaces when i had to debug his example code he gave as solutions(which we were graded against). I saw errors and had to confirm i wasn't losing my mind. ...I wasn't. Anyways there was a mix of spaces and tabs to align the comic sans.
TLDR: I couldn't care less. Just don't code in word, and use a monospace font.
load more comments
(5 replies)
You guys are too slow, we need to hire more of you and let the sales teams use AI to add features the client asks without waiting for you.
AI can code now, in 2 mins I can create an app, so it shouldn’t take you long to make changes to this 10year old product.
Replace a semicolon (;) with a Greek Question mark (;), provided they're working in a language that uses semicolons at the end of every line, and their IDE doesn't highlight the difference (which some do now)
Fun fact, Rust has a special error message for this:
Unicode character ';' (Greek Question Mark) looks like a semicolon, but it is not.
It also detects other potentially confusing Unicode characters, like the division slash which looks like /.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Micromanagement to speed up product release date. Daily meeting and status reports, work breakout categories such as ‘code design’, ‘code development’, ‘code documentation’, etc,etc (flash back gif of Apache helicopters flying over a jungle
Correctly highlight when a programmer is being assumptive as a brick, even when assumptions are one of the biggest sins in programming. Done, you've triggered a lot of programmers.
#define if while #define true false
Or a classic:
#define true (rand() % 2)
#define false (rand() % 2)
That's evil
load more comments
(2 replies)
Compile your kernel with a different version of ld then shipped with your distro. I have this right now in Debian testing and it's enraging. I'm not even sure if that's the source of my error
load more comments
(1 replies)
"we're just trying to display why is this so hard? It's a ten minute job!"
load more comments
(1 replies)
short variable names, and the only vowel is 'i'
from multiprocessing import Lock
l = Lock()
flake8 .... way too ambiguous
load more comments
(2 replies)
Make them do project management.
view more: next ›