this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2024
897 points (87.5% liked)

Programmer Humor

19646 readers
2451 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 162 points 1 month ago (26 children)

I think this thread is meant to flatter programmers and make linguists and sociologists extremely angry.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As someone with a background in linguistics, my jimmies are indeed rustled.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

IDK, comparing Javascript to English while Java to German seems to either overblow the value of javascript or diminish the value of English.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (24 replies)
[–] [email protected] 107 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I suspect there’s more people who speak Python fluently than Esperanto. So that comparison sits very wrong with me. The rest was funny :)

[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Esperanto always struck me as more perl-like with each part of speech having its own suffix like perl has $ for scalars, @ for arrays, and % for hashes. Though perl is probably more like a bunch of pidgins...

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 93 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (22 children)

Is this post sane-washing Russia? What’s left about Russia under Putin? Overall funny, though

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

It's a post by the lemmy dev, so yeah that's a given

load more comments (21 replies)
[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (6 children)

the root of all modern languages

the whole universe used to speak it

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

P.S: the closest thing to that is Egyptian, but not the language, the Alphabet (the Symbols, not a literal alphabet). Tons of alphabets are descended from Egyptian, including, but not limited to: Greek (and by Proxy Latin, Cyrillic, Georgian, Armenian, Armenian and Armenian (I just noticed this, I'm leaving it in because it's funny)), Arabic (and by proxy- I won't list all that), Hebrew, and Aramaic (and by proxy all Indian languages but one, as well as Tibetan, Phags-pa mongol (and by proxy exactly 5 letters of Hangul), Thai, Lao, Sundanese, and Javanese). There's a lot of dead languages that used scripts derived from Egyptian too but I didn't mention them because I'd be here all day listing stuff like Sogdian or Norse Runes.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

BASIC: Am I a joke to you?

load more comments (4 replies)
load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (20 children)

Why is everyone down on Rust? Seriously. I don't know it but I've considered learning it and it appeals to me and people literally scoff when I mention it. Saw it referred to as a meme language on Lemmy, which is built in Rust. What am I missing?

[–] [email protected] 47 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Butthurt C devs don't want it replacing their language.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

as guy who likes c: think rust is a good and cool idea

[–] Feyd 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I think rust has good ideas and may even become the default systems language in the mid-term. I find it irritating that there is a very vocal subset of rust proponents that tend to insist that every project in every language needs to be rewritten in rust immediately. I suspect that is also why other people are down on rust.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago

I think ppl just got pissed with the fanboys unironically asking to RIIR everything. The language itself is comfy AF, tho

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (6 children)

For me "The Critical Flaw" of rust is its compiler. And requirent of 12 GB of disk space to compile just the frontend of compiler. Even GCC will all frontends(C, C++, Ada, Fortran, Modula-2, JIT) requires less space.

But joke is probably about "rewrite in rust" culture.

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] Sl00k 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Imo it's bc it's the new kid on the block. Yes it's 10 years old but barely becoming common use in production and government mandates are only speeding that up. In actuality it's a great language and has been hyped for a few years by people who actually use it. Python went through the same thing in the 2010s where devs really tried clowning on it, now it's used everywhere.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (15 replies)
[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago (14 children)

I finally found the real reason why I like java: I‘m german

load more comments (14 replies)
[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

PHP is Russian. Used to be huge, caused lots of problems, now slowly dwindling away. Its supporters keep saying how it's still better than the competition.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 days ago

True, but only because it actually is. Except weirdos who saw php code 20 years ago say it sucks.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago

In Soviet Russia memory manages you!

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

It's a cool meme but I have many many disagreements.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I can confidently tell you that no one who actually knows Latin would ever say French is "Latin with fancy rules."

[–] sus 36 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

..which ironically makes for a perfect parallel with "C/C++"

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 month ago

It fits, English and JavaScript are both three languages in a trench coat.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As a python developer, I'll accept the shower joke in stride. But who are these Esperanto speakers you're shitting on?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

I guess assembler is sumerien then, only still written and understood? And cobol or fortran? Linear a and b?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

FORTRAN: Proto-Indo-European COBOL: Proto-Sino-Tibetic

Assembly: neuron signals

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Well latin isn't the root of all modern languages

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

But people like and appreciate German.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

Yeah, I enjoyed learning German... Java on the other hand....

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Perl is... forgotten entirely, despite its efforts in getting us from there to here.

Yup, checks out.

PHP also, but good riddance:-D.

Shell scripting is the ink that makes up these words - without them, you would never have seen this image.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I think Perl is closer to Esperanto - the vast majority of people will never want to learn it and the people that know it won't stfu about how everyone should use it! And they could all use a shower!

(I kid... Mostly)

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] ICastFist 24 points 1 month ago

Java, verbose? laughs in Pascal

Python being Esperanto? Yeah, no, because Python is actually being used

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (6 children)

I want to disagree on German. It isn't verbose. We've got several words where there isn't an equivalent in pretty much any other languages. Including Schadenfreude und Torschlusspanik (the feeling that you are getting older l, can't find a partner and will die alone).

The same EU legal text has in German 22.118 words Vs English 24.698.

The making me cry part, that's fair. Overcomplicated, could be worse.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

The same EU legal text has in German 22.118 words Vs English 24.698.

That needs a character count really. Words isn't a particularly relevant measure when the language uses compound words

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I think word count is not the best metric precisely because of what you mention. "Krankenversicherungskarte" is one word vs the three word "health insurance card", but they convey the same information in roughly the same amount of characters.

Overall I don't find German particularly verbose, only sometimes a small phrase is condensed into a single word.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Rust is esperanto because its only actually used by a small group of nerds,

python is russian because everything made in it is unreliable.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (8 children)

Out of curuosity, what is the programming equivalent of Japanese?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I was tempted to say Ruby, but based on my friends that are learning (or tried to learn Japanese), it seems like Ruby is trying to be the opposite. So not sure.

Ruby would maybe fit with toki pona : terse, simple, predictable.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

Clojure, a simple grammar but most of the vocabulary is imported from another language.

load more comments (6 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago

Hearing about Esperanto the first time. Hate itwhen someone copies my idea and does it in 1887

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Rust is more like Esperanto isn’t it? It’s Latin, but regularized and with the rough edges sanded off.

Python is more like Spanish. A billion speakers in the world, and really easy to pick up a few phrases, but a small European minority still think they run it.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ackshully, Clojure is Esperanto, and I will not be taking questions at this time.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

Гарантийный без ошибки памятей!

I unironically think it would be hilarious to write a borrow-checked version of Адрес. (The Soviet version of C - or rather C is a version of it, given that Адрес was first compiled in '55)

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (16 children)

Can anyone actually tell what exactly complicated in Java? Verbose, maybe it was at some point but I find it very straightforward and easy.

load more comments (16 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

Rust is more like Lojban. Its adherents are just as excited to tell you about it and it too was created to fix all those pesky problems from people using their language imprecisely.

load more comments
view more: next ›