Programmer Humor

DROP TABLE

That seems like a pretty efficient query!

Not understanding SQL (and in some cases NoSQL DBs) and the underlying database are a reason that so many full stack devs suck. Just because they use an ORM, they think the database work is magically solved, until they realize it’s just doing what they’re telling it to do and their lack of DB understanding has created an awful database structure. And then a DBA comes in, and then the entire ORM layer has to be scrapped because it’s trash, so on and so forth. A full stack engineer doesn’t have to be a DBA, but they sure as hell need to know what the ORM is doing to their data they are CRUDing

Real back-end requirements: when x, y goes in (in JSON-as-an-XML-CDATA-block because historical reasons), I want you to output x+y+z+æ+the proof to P=NP.

æ will require you yo compile x+y in CSV, email it to Jenny, who will email back the answer. She doesn't quite know how to export excel sheets though so you'd better build a robust validator. No, we don't know what æ is supposed to look like, Rob from Frontend knows but he's on vacation for the next 8 months.

The request must be processed under 100 ms as the frontend team won't be able to prioritize asynchronous loading for another 10 sprints and we don't want the webpage to freeze.

And why does your API return a 400 when I send a picture of my feet? Please fix urgently, these errors are polluting my monitoring dashboard and we have KPIs on monitoring alerts.

Actually the front end stuff is more like "we need to make the 'sign in' button bigger. No one can click it because it's tiny, and it's in German."

Man, if only backend demands were algebraically tractable. Often they're related to frontend demands that may or may not make backend sense, since the frontend is all users see.

Full stack means we do it because nobody else will.

I think knowing about frontend is important for a senior or higher level engineer. I would expect someone at that level to be able to contribute where necessary, and know enough to make sane decisions and know when those decisions impact backend/frontend. But to be equally good at both isn't reasonable

As someone who likes to dip their toes into everything, I feel a bit called out by "master of nothing".

In my case, it was to increase the number of available job opportunities rather than any genuine interest.

My company started with full stack devs only and we've transitioned to specialized back end and front end since we realized that 1 specialized BE Engineer and 1 specialized FE Engineer can work faster with better quality than having 2 Full Stack Engineers.

Frontend dev here, can confirm. Last week I had to look at some Java code and was instantly greeted by some AbstractFactoryBuilderImpl. Nightmare fuel if you ask me.

Overspecialisation can also suck eggs. Interdisciplinary research is trendy in science for the that reason. Even I occasionally read a paper and can see they're missing some basic fact from another field or subfield that totally undercuts their result.

Who is using python for frontend?

I'm terrified by this binary config file. Why?! Was he writing C and said "fuck it, memcpy"?

Edit: I suppose it would be more like "fuck it, fprintf(f, (char*)my_config_object, sizeof(my_config_object))"

It may suggest the company doesn't want to hire the appropriate amount of engineers, with the appropriate expertise, and instead want a mule. It also may suggest that product quality is a low priority.

It'd help if the JavaScript ecosystem could pause on inventing new frameworks every five minutes and instead focus on fixing their tooling problems.