this post was submitted on 02 Jul 2024
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Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

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[–] [email protected] 152 points 4 months ago (7 children)

Okay, if you think that's a good idea image

[–] [email protected] 43 points 4 months ago

Shorts are too long.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Don't body shame, some people are into that body.

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[–] [email protected] 117 points 4 months ago (5 children)
[–] [email protected] 54 points 4 months ago

This.

Bubble gut and Jorts isn't exactly a good look.

Oh it's a look, alright but not a good one.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago

The thighs have paled

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[–] [email protected] 88 points 4 months ago (4 children)

Because body positivity doesn't exist for men.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 months ago

I was going to say, because I don't have the stomach of a half starved gym rat. But yours is also good.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Hey my dude. I'll cat call you if you want.

Damn bro you hot as fuck no homo. Like shit man, you rocking that shirt like you belong in a museum of sexy ass motherfuckers no homo. Damn man if I was into dudes, I'd want your body all over mines no homo.

Anyways have a nice day.

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[–] [email protected] 73 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Is Reno 911 the more recent example of this?

[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 months ago (1 children)

To provide some perspective/existential dread, that character was introduced over 20 years ago.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago

NO! You can't say that. It defies all know time logic.

[–] [email protected] 64 points 4 months ago

I'm not really looking to attract other men at this time

[–] [email protected] 41 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It's not gay enough anymore.

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 4 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 months ago (9 children)

Women what’s stopping you from dressing like 80s horror movie hotties?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Nobody puts shoulder pads like that on dresses anymore

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 4 months ago

Because I'm currently dressed like a skateboarder from the 90's and it's so very comfortable.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 4 months ago

Have you seen those movies and what happens to the guys dressed like that?

Try again, Freddy / Jason / Michael / motherfucker

[–] [email protected] 36 points 4 months ago

High fructose corn syrup.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 4 months ago

A lack of 80s beach babes who would enjoy this kind out outfit

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Because I did that in the 80s, so now I don't, to protect the public from trauma.

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago

Shame, mostly shame.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago

Mostly homophobia I would guess.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Because people don't look like they did in the 80's anymore.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago

Too little cocaine in today's diet.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago (3 children)

My dad bod. I used to wear short shorts and didn't care if my shirt rode up

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Belly too fat for the cut off shirt; ass not fat enough for the cut off shorts.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago

Wear the shorts on your chest and the shirt on your butt?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago

I'll spare the public from having to see my hairy gut and cheeks

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago

It’s still summer, so I’m rocking my 70’s coke dealer vibe, and don’t want to put away the floral shirts just yet.

The cut-off athletic wear look is definitely a late summer/early autumn. If I can find appropriately skimpy shorts and cut offs, I’ll be all about it.

There needs to be a “Modern Himbo” store so finding clothes like these isn’t such a chore.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago

Survivorship bias…

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (4 children)

I'm turning 30 in January, and I'm quite self concious of my belly :(

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Cause I'd look like a mustard tiger selling greasy cheeseburgers

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 months ago

The weather

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago

A sense of dignity.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (5 children)

because straight men are terrified of appearing gay.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Because it looks dumb af and always did?

Just like the hairstyles everyone had in the 80's. There's a reason no one really dresses like that and it's because generally everyone realized how dumb it really was.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (5 children)

Too many scars.

Edit:

2 down votes.

I have real scars, I am embarrassed greatly by how they make me look, even though I could otherwise pull off this look as I am in decent shape.

Guess body shaming is still cool to do to guys.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

Social contracts about decency.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I went to a 70's themed costume party once and wore short jean shorts like that. Let's just say they only work when you wear tighty whiteys not boxers

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Are you ok, comments? Check your body dysphoria, if you can, that isn't healthy.

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