this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2024
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Programmer Humor

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[–] [email protected] 140 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 year ago

Good ol' Bobby Tables

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[–] [email protected] 82 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Yes, I'll name my child parent. This will reverse the tree, vertically.

[–] LinearArray 12 points 1 year ago

It's Sims 2 all over again.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

And if they settle on they/them pronouns, you could have an inverted non-binary tree.

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[–] [email protected] 69 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What about Alice, Bob, and Eve?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (2 children)

They're currently shaking hands and too busy to let us borrow their names

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[–] somegeek 53 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I love you so much NullPointerException

[–] astraeus 20 points 1 year ago

Oh no, we’ve lost NaN again!

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 year ago (3 children)

fun fact elif is a legit girl name in Turkish

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

"Pointer, where are you?" Points at Parent, my other child

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

OOP issues LOL!

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[–] technom 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why no Ada or Janet? Or Haskell or Idris?

[–] Tja 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Ada is in fact named after a person, thus completing the circle.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 year ago

Elif is a feminine Turkish name :)

[–] peyotecosmico 28 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You know, OOP in Spanish translates as "Programación orientada a objetos" or POO in case you need it

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

"Yo shut the fuck up Linked list, you're annoying as hell"

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago

Little baby FORTRAN

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A friend of mine named his dog Byte. The dog is very playful, and has the habit of running in the direction of other people he meets.

When the dog does that my friend tries to call him back shouting: "BYTE!! BYTE!!". People get really scared when this happens 😂

Okay, not so funny if you are the one being approached by the dog.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago

That's probably a little unethical but the mental image is absolutely hilarious.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Meet my kids, Sed and Awk.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago

And my dog, Cat.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (4 children)

"child" seems to be enough. short and concise.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

“Slave” works too.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Definitely naming my next dog Byte.

Edit: Petabyte!

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago

Ah yes Julia, an unreasonably effective name to give your child

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Just name your child Linus like we all do...

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago

How could they forget Pascal :/

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

This reminded me I haven't heard from my uncle Foo Bar in a while. (He spells it Fubar)

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Just name the kid Basic, hardly worse than the Trahgedhieghs running around today

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

Oh yes, OOP, the namest of names

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

As a Python programmer I'll have to name my child Dictionary, of course.

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[–] ICastFist 13 points 1 year ago (9 children)

Zig missing from the list is sad for very old meme reasons, too.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

Nothing beats Bobby Tables.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I'm naming my mid Iron Python and there's nothing you can do to stop me.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm naming mine 1337Code jr

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I like "Vectoria".

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Haskell? Curry? Maybe even Brooks.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Haskell is an awesome name for a baby

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Naming ~~things~~ kids is the hardest part of programming.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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