this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2025
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If one day there is only smart toilets, I will go shit in the woods and start to live like an animal. Clearly humanity was a mistake and we should return to monke
The problem isn't necessarily smart toilets. The problem is companies attempting to have complete control over the product and ensuring that their products do not function without dependency on their infrastructure.
There is no functional reason to have a toilet connect to an outside server. There are no functional reasons to have many of these smart devices require outside dependencies. But their profits and their subscription models definitely benefit from being able to remotely disable features.
Technology is garbage not because we've gone too far with Technology. Technology is garbage because of capitalism.
So that all the toilets you poop in can share data on your poops and get a complete picture of your bowel health.
Correlates poops to your Uber eats from chipotle, serves you up Pepto ads preemptively.
Sounds like an anxiety inducing app. And I thought sleep tracking was anxiety inducing. Imagine getting a notification that you might have ass cancer.
"Being unable to take a shit is a small price to pay for the almighty poop-scanner"
Then can you compete with the bear?
Or the Pope?
Introducing the Smart Catholic. Track your Hail Marys from the convenience of your phone, and add more with a simple tap. Subscribe to one of our new pergatory plans today, 3 months half price when you buy your Smart Catholic!
Right? If I can't flush my toilet with nothing more than a bucket of water, if necessary, then I don't want to shit in it.