Susaga

joined 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 33 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

"He's at the Hilton!" "Well then, let's go there!" "I dunno, it doesn't sound great. This guy only ranked it 2 stars, and apparently it really hates cops."

[–] [email protected] 39 points 5 months ago

If you kill a PC with a recreation of the Boromir death scene, you might be able to hit all three at once!

[–] [email protected] 68 points 5 months ago (4 children)

And we played the first thing that came to our heads
Just so happened to be
The best song in the world
It was the best song in the world

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

They were being kind and assuming there was a miscommunication.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

I wasn't a good DM either. But then I learned. I threw encounters at the players I thought might be fun, and I missed the mark almost every single time. But my players had fun, so I don't see the problem in getting those encounters wrong. And every failure taught me so much more than every success.

If you fail, but you keep it fun and learn for the future, what have you lost? Only your pride.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 5 months ago (3 children)

But some monsters are strong against certain builds and weak against others. Some monsters are stronger in certain environment and entirely nullified by others. Some monsters are stronger given certain allies and weaker when alone.

If you could devise a system to assign monster complexity based on every scenario you can imagine that monster being part of, then either that's an astonishingly small number of scenarios or an absurdly complex calculation to force on anyone.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (9 children)

I think it's mostly cowardice, personally. People don't want to risk putting their own choices into a game based entirely on choices, just in case they aren't as good. It's better to use someone else's decisions than risk your own pride.

Then you have ignorance. A lot of people don't know how to fill the gaps, and WotC has never bothered teaching them how. Any rules they did get are rules of thumb and aren't something to use without thought (like CR), so people complain for reason 1 again.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago

"You will reunite with a friend"
"The bad times will be over quickly"
"A sudden windfall will come your way"

[–] [email protected] 20 points 5 months ago

That's bollocks. Whoever claimed that people used to draw dicks to ward off evil was talking out of their ass to make a dick pic seem classier. They were just embarrassed that their submission in an archeological journal was so similar to what they carved into their desk in school, and I'm damn certain the school desk isn't protected from evil either.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

I find it funny that you directly quoted wikipedia to write that (exact wording from the paradox article, I checked), but ignored the sentence immediately before it (...or a statement that runs contrary to one's expectation). Also, the linked articles at the bottom include the unexpected hanging page. Maybe read the entire wiki page before citing it?

Also, in case wikipedia suddenly isn't enough, here's an article on wolfram to back me up: https://mathworld.wolfram.com/UnexpectedHangingParadox.html

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (3 children)

My dude. The paradox doesn't change based on whether or not the judge knows the truth, or even if the man dies.

The truth is the man was made not to expect a thing by his own logic proving he would always expect a thing. The paradox is based on his own prediction being wrong because of his prediction. In this instance, his prediction was what his emotions would be.

A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" I haven't said how they remove the horse from the bar, so does that mean I didn't tell a joke? Or does horse removal not actually matter to the joke?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago

You have understood nothing.

Neither statement can be true OR false. If statement A is true, statement B is true, which means statement A is false. To simplify, if statement A is true, statement A is false.

"This statement is false" can be neither true nor false. That is the most basic paradox there is.

 

The logician, somewhat baffled at the man's comment, decides to educate him in the basics of logic. "Well, it's simple reasoning. You take a fact and draw other facts from it, like... Do you own a lawnmower?"

"Uh, yeah? So?"

"Well then, logically, you must own a lawn, correct?"

"Well, yeah."

"If you have a lawn, then I must logically assume you have a house to go with it."

"Yeah, that's right!"

"And a house would be too big for one man, so am I right in assuming you have a wife? Kids, perhaps?"

"I do! Two kids, a third on the way!"

"Then logically, you must be straight. And it goes on like that, you see? Logic."

"That's incredible! I've gotta tell my buddies about this!"

The logician is again baffled that the man's friends don't know what logic is either, but thinks little of it as he watches the man leave.


That evening, the man approaches his friend and says "Hey, have you heard about this thing called logic?"

"What the hell is that?"

"Okay, so it goes like this: Do you own a lawnmower?"

"No?"

"That means you're gay."

 

He goes around the base to give things an inspection, hoping he can make a few changes to improve things. Only half way through his inspection, he finds a private stood next to a bench, seemingly doing nothing.

Commander: Private, what are you standing around for?
Private: Sir! My orders are to stand here and make sure nobody sits on this bench, sir!
Commander: ...Why?
Private: I'm not sure, sir! I was just told to do this by the previous commander!

Utterly confused, but unwilling to let the mystery lie, the commander makes a call to the previous commander, now promoted to brigadier.

Commander: Brigadier, sir. I just gained control of Fort Naimheer, and I was wondering why you ordered a man to stand next to a bench and tell people not to sit on it.
Brigadier: Oh, that guy? Yeah, I didn't give the order to begin with. I just figured the other guy had a reason for it, so I left it alone.

Now even more confused, the commander makes contact with the general who led the base before him.

Commander: General, sir. I just gained control of Fort Naimheer, and I was wondering why you ordered a man to stand next to a bench and tell people not to sit on it.
General: Huh? Oh, that? It was a standing order. Before my time, you see.
Commander: Figured as much. Do you know who first issued the order?
General: Oh, I believe so. He's retired by now, but I could get you in contact with him.

Finally, the commander makes contact with the veteran, a former commander like himself, who first made the order.

Commander: Hello, sir. Sorry to interrupt your retirement, but I just gained control of Fort Naimheer. Is there a reason why there's a man standing next to a bench and telling people not to sit on it?
Veteran: ...Is the paint still wet?

 

As it turns out, this comic is a brilliant meme format, and we need to get the ball rolling on this.

 

The bartender asks the horse "I take it you'll have an ale?"

The horse says "I think not" and promptly disappears.

This joke plays on the classic idea of "I think, therefore I am", but I didn't want to explain the joke before you heard it. That would be putting Descartes before the horse.

 

Or did she?

 

He said no.

 

The oldest hen on the farm immediately flocks to the new hen and offers to show her around. "Here's where the food usually gets thrown. You're welcome to peck and whatever's nearby.

Over here's a trough of water. You can drink from it, bathe, whatever you like. Just don't poop in it, cause we all use it.

Over here are the chicken coops. It's where we go to sleep for the night. Just take any open nest and rest for the night.

Over there's the rooster. He likes to think he's in charge, but we all know who has the real power around here.

This is a gap in the fence, and it leads to a main road. Don't be tempted! If you cross that road, you'll never hear the end of it!"

 

The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses here!"

Helium doesn't react.

 

You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish.

 

It's recently struck me as odd that the game uses the term Light Dragon, but doesn't use Fire Dragon, Ice Dragon and Shock Dragon. I know why the Light Dragon wasn't named, and there's probably a lore reason implied by Dinral, Naydra and Farosh being given actual names, but it'd be nice if the Light Dragon fit the pattern.

So the question is, if you were to give the Light Dragon a name to fit with the others (likely given to her by people who see her), what would it be?

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