Some ideas you've probably already considered:
Nitrates and nitrites: in pretty much every commercial sausage. May be listed in the ingredients as curing salt or Prague powder.
Onion or garlic powder
Breadcrumbs
Emulsifiers: in any kind of hotdog or Weiner where it's all blended and looks smooth, as opposed to a sausage where you can actually see little pieces of fat and meat. Listed in the ingredients as some kind of gum or some kind of glyceride.
Is he drinking out of a sippy cup?
I don't know whether to believe the meme or the comment on the meme.
I believe that's a Calvin and Hobbes reference.
That user base is a drop in the ocean compared to most of reddits user base, and those people have all left already.
Like English?
Unfortunately a lot of doctors seem to take pride in it, and any suggestion that they could be unsafe due to fatigue is taken as a personal attack against their flawless integrity.
If you have pressure wash your anus to blast the shit loose, maybe you've got some other problem.
The comparison in this case is operating on the word half, not on the subject of the sentence:
Only half want to get married, even less [than half] want kids.
The oil painting filter in gimp would do this in about one second.