this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2025
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

it's what believers crave! it's got electrolytes!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] JackbyDev 2 points 2 days ago

Yeah they don't put him in the uniform anymore lol

[–] [email protected] 214 points 4 days ago (1 children)

More consequences than if it had raped some kids.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 4 days ago (1 children)

To be fair if you make an AI and ask it to be an authentic catholic priest you'd essentially have to reward it for such actions because it understood the assignment. Now why you'd make such an abomination in the first place that I don't know. The ways of the lord and all that...

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Turns out "the ways of the lord" = capitalism. That's probably why he condemned his socialist son to torture and crucifixion; for the crime of empathy! God was like "Helping the poor? Absolutely fucking not!".

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

I mean, I'm not a theologist or anything, but based on other precedents, if someone was dying and wanted to be baptized at the last second, and no source of water could be arranged on time, the Gatorade baptism would probably be accepted by the Catholic church.

Transubstantiation of Gatorade into Holy Water doesn't even sound that outrageous when priests claim to transubstantiate wine to blood on a daily basis.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago (5 children)

This seems to mean that priests can theoretically make any liquid holy, thereby making holy Gatorade.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Uh, skeet skeet "enjoy salvation"

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

They've got holy water and holy wine. Why not holy beer.

"This is my piss, drink of it and be holy"

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Bartender: "Sorry, dude, you've had quite a few drinks, I have to cut you off, only water for you from now on."

Jesus: "Dammit... "

[–] [email protected] 122 points 4 days ago (14 children)

I have been in IT for 20 years, have both a BS and MS in Information Technology, and I will never understand why EVERYONE has such a hard-on for AI; especially given its track record of “hallucinations”.

[–] [email protected] 96 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Aren't a lot of religions based on hallucinations that specific people have had?

[–] [email protected] 33 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Goddamnit. Take my effing upvote.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 4 days ago (2 children)

You have been in IT for 20 years and don’t understand this? Has your career not made it abundantly clear that the average person is completely computer illiterate and has no idea what AI even is? How many people have you had to assist in 20 years who insist that they have tried every possible solution, only to find out that something isn’t even plugged in or turned on?

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Idiocracy 2, where the dumbest priest ever is sent into the future to save Catholicism.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Someone get Mike Judge on the phone

[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I legit thought it was going to say it found some way to molest a kid

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 days ago

That usually results in promotion

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Somehow, I imagine it similar to this

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 days ago

“It’s what plants crave.”

[–] [email protected] 76 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Well obviously that's wrong, everyone who took catholic theology studies in college knows it should either be monster or white claw /j

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 days ago (4 children)
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[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 days ago (2 children)

That image makes me think he's going to get mad at me for pursuing a culture victory.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 days ago (5 children)

I mean, water has to be blessed by a priest first before it becomes holy. So, what if the only thing available is a bottle of Gatorade but you have a priest? Couldn't he bless the Gatorade so that the person could be baptized?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Yes, but, every sperm is sacred, so God might get irate.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Thank God we are protestant!

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[–] [email protected] 41 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Better move him to a new Parish before they figure what type of AI pornography he's into.

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[–] [email protected] 49 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

It's got what babies crave.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 days ago (9 children)

As an actual, honest-to-God (Episcopal) priest myself, the idea of an “AI priest” is very troubling.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

The church will make an AI priest before making a woman a "priest"

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago

wow they weren't kidding about civ7

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 28 points 4 days ago

It has what heathens crave.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago

Sippin on the haterade as usual.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You can literally do it with spit.... And that's not a hypothetical. You can do it with any fluid if necessary... How is this controversial?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

Because not all dogma can be easily explained or defended so it is easier to hunt the messenger. Compare to evangelicals and how much they roar against some things in the old covenant as sins while still using cloth made of mixed materials, eat bacon or refuse to kill their kids if they are not respectful enough.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

Sam and Dean using Holy Church flavoured Gatorade to defeat evil, then drinking the rest to recover their lost electrolytes...

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 days ago (2 children)

How many kids did he rape? That seems to be the problem with the priests.

Who cares about their goofy ass rituals as long as he doesn’t rape kids.

Priests rape kids at an astonishing rate.

The Catholic Church is a gigantic pederast ring.

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