this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2025
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Lolita while furrowing your brow and shaking your head so everyone knows you disagree with the protagonist's actions.
Surviving Life With Your Gigantic Penis by Chris Boden.
Yes, that's the title of an actual book.
Based off of the try-hard linkedin douches I know I'd say:
- The Art of War
- Meditations by Marcus Aurelius
- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
- Rich-dad poor-dad
- The Art of the Deal
If this is the approach, Infinite Jest and War and Peace are solid options. Maybe Oversized Penises for Dummies.
Fuck great call. I thought having two "war" novels might make the joke worse but Infinite Jest is peak big brain public masturbation reading material
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Art.
And once you've finished:
Rev. Owen Thomas
He should know. He already read a different book about a guy who was hung like this:
But make sure you shake your head the whole time so people know you disagree with irrational numbers.
Is the new thing making fun of people who read on the train? I do it all the time ☹️
John said "reading performatively" - so, unless you're doing that...
Thankfully the people in charge of deciding whether your actions are performative or not have great judgment
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I’m curious to know what counts as performative reading haha
Reading feminist literature to pick up women. That sort of thing. I don't think it happens much. I've never looked at someone and thought they were doing it. I'm sure at least some people do it on occasion though.
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If you mean reading performatively ALOUD on public transportation, there's only one choice: The Bible, King James Version.
Gormenghast by Mervyn Peake.
Gotta start with Titus Groan! Just skip the forword that was added most recently though.
I won't accept this anti pigeon rhetoric.
House of Leaves. That way if anyone notices you’re holding it upside down they’ll just think you’re really into it. And if anyone asks you what it’s about you can say “I have no fucking clue what’s happening, there’s a house I think?” and you’ll be correct.
Um. I think it's pretty easy to understand, but it's all a meta-narrative with an unreliable narrator.
The narrative devices are quite ingenious.
I watched a video essay on MyHouse.wad. I've never played Doom or read House of Leaves. Now I don't need to do either.
I love the book, just gently poking fun.
Why Civil Resistance Works by Eric Chenoweth & Maria Stephan
Is the answer the implied threat of uncivil resistance?
Oh god do people think you're being performative when you read in public transport?
Only people who don't read.
Anything by Chuck Tingle
Is there a book about how Ayn Rand was a total piece of shit that helped ruin America?
Catcher in the Rye, of course.
Make sure to scribble madly, illegibly, in the margins and the occassionally glare at your fellow passengers while making finger guns.
Can't believe no one's suggested Nietzsche (Zarathustra, etc). Maybe no longer in vogue now that sincerity is on the rise, though.
You can never go wrong with the classic, Turtleneck top, glases (not optional), sneakers, Ulysses.
There is a more modern way though, bring a travel chessboard and do random moves, then look at your phone type somethgin, wait, and then make another random move.
Did any of Chuck Tingle's books get physical releases?
Yes. I've seen this at a queer bookstore.
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Moby Dick. It is free, unnecessarily long, really wordy, and mostly boring.
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