this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
499 points (96.6% liked)

Not The Onion

12756 readers
477 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
(page 2) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Muffi 36 points 2 days ago

It's called being a political consumer, you dipshit

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Zuckerberg reportedly decided to do away with censorship mechanisms at Meta after a seemingly innocuous photo that he posted on Facebook in November 2023 about the surgery that was performed on his left anterior cruciate ligament failed to go viral,

pathetic

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I never saw a post from him on Facebook, I was wondering if he even posted..

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 days ago

"vote with your wallet and you can affect a corporation!"

Also:

"Fuck you, I'm entitled to your participation (your data) or you're a virtue signaler leftist baby."

I wish I wasn't an atheist, at least I'd have some comfort in knowing pieces of shit get what they deserve. Instead they just become billionaires and live amazing lives.

[–] MajorHavoc 47 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's weird to realize I would wait in line for like 45 minutes up piss on Zuckerberg's grave, should the legal opportunity ever arise.

Just a thought for his next of kin to consider, in due time...

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 33 points 3 days ago

I'm just trying to save his neutered business from my feminine energy.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Mark Zuckerberg the chicken fucker?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Ostrich fucker. Allegedly….

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I heard it was a sick ostrich.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I'll be glad to signal my foot up his ass

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 days ago (2 children)

“Meta has us in a chokehold. They make money off our presence in order to continue to be in business and yet it’s too difficult for people to leave,” Makichen wrote.

Difficult? How? I'm pretty sure I still have an account on Facebook from it's early days, but I haven't logged in to it in more than a decade. Friends and family can reach me in other ways, like email or better yet a phone call.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

They are talking about their business. The massage place I go to is primarily thru Facebook. They have their own site but it was easier to just request a appointment.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Many businesses have dead websites now, as all the visibility is just through Facebook and Google Maps.

It’s very different than Twitter, where most business use (outside of influencers and influence campaigns) amounts to status updates that can be given elsewhere.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 days ago

lol

Eat turds Zuck

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago

I don't know, sounds like he's just virtue signaling to me.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 days ago

As opposed to signalling that you have none.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 days ago

His AI is picking from random internet phrases to see if it unlocks a reward function.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 days ago

Sorry Zuck, but "virtue" is not the message all those people making hand gestures at you are trying to signal.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago

Yes, we are. You are still losing users.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I wonder what he would say about me never having used Facebook. or any of his other "services"?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

Even if they are, they still have fucking virtues, unlike your robotic ass, Zuck.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

My virtues are signaling over here

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

I'm not sure if this headline meets the criteria for not the onion.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago

ROFL I’m signaling the virtue of my privacy kept safe by escaping Meta and not being on a platform hosted by a deranged billionaire. 🤣

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

Yes, now tell me the problem with that

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (4 children)

What Mark is really saying you will be back. if anyone is still on Facebook after all these years he is probably right. He also knows if anything that does take it out. He will just buy it up and once again those people will be back under meta's control. He has too much money. The only answer is to stop using identity based social media.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

My mom moved away from meta because of this asshat. It seems now everything is possible. She went from WhatsApp to signal and Facebook to Bluesky.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Good for her I'm glad one person got away

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 days ago

That's the beauty of the fediverse. It cannot be bought anymore than someone can buy "the internet".

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago

Why would anyone quit adult daycare? Unless they are in the content moderation mines in Africa getting ptsd from seeing the horrors of humanity.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Mark Zuckerberg is a dork.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›