this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2025
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The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 105 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Is that the guy that likes to give blow jobs to dead pigs?

[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 days ago

That's probably how he caught werewolf gonorrhea.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

You have to be careful with information like that. It might encourage some greedy little pigboy to become an hero.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I thought that was former UK Prime Minister David Cameron.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

¿Por que no los dos? Maybe they even like to do it together?

[–] [email protected] 112 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Possibly THE funniest thing to see as the first thing populating the homepage when tripping shrooms. Good laugh.

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[–] [email protected] 75 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

They stopped fact checking just like Twitter didn't stop fact checking. It means they only stopped fact checking right wing news or popular posts that Zuckerberg doesn't like.

I assure you, if a Luigi post got popular, Facebook will "fact check" it before it gains traction.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Just like any corporate status quo enforcer would yeah. Eh this is me probably preaching to the choir.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Now that you mention it, it's interesting, considering how we all share the same views, how we use this platform to preach to ourselves rather than to organize and collaborate

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

I've long said that it's possible venting anger on social media may be kinda like announcing you're gonna do something healthy and then not actually following through, because the brain's flawed reward system gives you the good feel chemicals for just fantasizing about going on that run instead of actually going for a run.

The next question I consider is if it wasn't a deliberate consequence in the early internet...are the billionaire corporates in charge of social media platforms aware of this now, thereby actively seeking out ways to make us docile more efficiently so we don't get "uppity?"

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Interesting and unfortunate.

[–] [email protected] 78 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Almost worth making a Facebook account to disseminate facts like this.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 days ago
[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I've still got one I keep semi-active (to stay in touch with long-distance relatives who aren't tech-savvy enough to move past their first social media site, LOL) and I'll happily post this over there!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

I keep mine alive for the same reason. This got me to post there for the first time since 2 or 3 years

[–] [email protected] 47 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Ya know if the online world becomes such a cesspool because of Musk and Zuckerberg that it actually brings back the old internet, that would be fucking funny.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

In order to bring back the old internet you need to stop interacting with corporate silo sites.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Give me niche websites by hobbyists, not "influencers" and stumbleupon 2.0!

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 3 days ago

Ol' Rat Cock is at it again, smh.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 days ago

The UHC killer Mark Zuckerberg who framed Luigi?

[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I’m so glad that we have reliable news sources to inform us in these trying times.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

Do you think the onion has satire checkers, to make sure stuff is not reality?

I think the satire checkers dropped the ball on this one.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This gif looks like it’s from a mid-90s GeoCities page.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Reject modernity, embrace You're The Man Now Dog.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I heard he eats prolapsed sphincters of diseased elderly animals.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

No that's RFK

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That's wrong. He wants the user base to check the facts.

Looks correct, if you ask me....

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

Facts are of course by majority rule

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 days ago

Congrats for the upgrade!

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Don't insult rats like that, man.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago

No one's insulting anyone. This is very generous from that rat and a huge upgrade for Zuck.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago

Yet, although this exhibits strong The Onion energy, strictly speaking this could be posted in Not The Onion. Names matter, and I would love to be a fly on the wall witnessing the momentary meltdowns when people read this there...

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

not fair, in the metaverse he has a big dong

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 days ago

In fact, it exceeds the metaverse maximum by exactly 3 inches. I saw an internal meeting about it where he said "take that, Chad. Who's got a small dick now?"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago

I can understand why he did this. This man has the smallest penis energy I've ever seen in my life.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

Shrodingers rat penis situation sounds like.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

his stupid new hair only makes him look even more punchable, somehow

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

Reports on meta state he's at least 10x more punchable.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

is the seed of Dee Snider cosplaying as zuck? terrifying asf

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

No, he ain't gonna take it!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

Would be interesting to see the quality of his AI Project when it's trained on unmoderated Facebook posts.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

And it was still an upgrade.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

So does it work? Can he fuck rats with it? Can he get rats pregnant?

I'm asking for a friend...squeak! Squeak!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

i was only really doing this for those woke's. you can come back antivaxers and q-anons, we're cool

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