this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2024
254 points (96.0% liked)

Funny

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[–] [email protected] 72 points 1 month ago

Seems like a good knight out.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Naughty jokes aside, I would love that, laugh my ass off, and look forward to an amazing date.

[–] [email protected] 42 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Going on a quest? Fuck yeah

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Nope. Going ice skating and then out for sushi.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

Close enough.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Wearing a full suit of armor, accomplishing either IS quite the quest 😄

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I challenge her to a duel. If I win, I gain her hand in marriage. If she wins... I suppose I would have to give her my hand in marriage.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Win - Win sort of plan you have.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I see what you did there

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Win - Win sort of plan you have.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago

Finally I could say "m'lady" without shame.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago

I put on my robe and wizard hat. If the date goes well, maybe I'll show her my wand of magic missile.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Break out some coconuts and become her faithful steed.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

He have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join his court at Camelot.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

Pledge fealty and marry her immediately

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Clearly, I'd put on my robe and wizard hat.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Bras are bad enough, now I have to learn how to take off a hauberk?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Make sure the pageboys are still around, cause getting in that mail is gonna be a team effort.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Somebody call the locksmith!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago
[–] JackbyDev 6 points 1 month ago

Hope she Lays on Hands me

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ok if you are wearing that then I'm wearing a wig, corset and big puffy dress.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

gotta one-up her in masculinity, make sure the frills are at least twice the size of yourself, and the shoes pointy enough to inflict stab wounds.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Drive to Constantinople, to party like it's 1204

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

What a Dame!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

"Lo, see ye her, all gleamin' in her plate, like some manner of queen, sittin' high in her gilded carriage, thinkin' herself bettr' than us 'cause of her fine metal and steed of silver."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Invite her back to my place for some jousting.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

If it wasn't the plan already, changing them to Medieval Times.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Oh... So I guess I can pass for a Wizard...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Jolly cooperation is what I'd do

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (4 children)

Taking off that chainmail will rip half of her hair off. If that's your thing...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

She should be okay if she's wearing one of those hair things underneath. I forget what they're called. It bunches up your hair like a shower cap and keeps your hair from getting in the armor

Edit: the girl here is not wearing one it seems though

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

It's called a coif. They also serve a critical part in terms of shock absorption.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Why would she ever take that off?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Thats a kind of a turnoff

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Typically a person wears a cap of some sort under the chainmail so that hair doesn't get entangled.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Refuse if she offers a handjob

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Too much makeup ! Deal breaker.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Definitely pretty pointy elbows