this post was submitted on 18 Sep 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 hour ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 34 minutes ago

No, they neglected to put the first part of the year, it's happening in 2124.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 46 minutes ago

I'm glad it didn't happen because I got to pet a cat while the world was supposed to be ending.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 35 minutes ago

Imagine if what qualified to get raptured were believing in it. The world would be so much better without all those people!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 hour ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

The miracle of prophecy is not related to the miracle of proper kerning.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 51 minutes ago

The kerning looks okay - it's the font that's weird.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

It's currently September 19th

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

Dude, you're already part god. You don't get to be raptured.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I also don't want to go to work

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Good news: you don't have to! You may end up losing your job and eating out of a dumpster, but you don't have to.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 hours ago

I think the Rapture was going to be happy before it was to happen.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

WTF! I missed it? Did every single Jehovah's witness drink the juice so they could fly into the spaceship or what? Postponed?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 hours ago (2 children)

Fun fact: Jehovah's witnesses think only 144,000 men go to heaven and then all the good JWs get new bodies on Earth.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Funner fact. The Jehovah's Witnesses calculated that the year would be 1844, and someone did start a religion that year claiming to be the return, but that was in Persia, so they didn't know. They decided they must have miscalculated, and recalculated the date multiple times until 1900 at which point they basically just said, "he's late." They were literally started to look for the return of Christ, and because it didn't happen exactly the way they thought it should, they gave up and claimed that God must be wrong.

I have fun with JWs when they come to my door.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago (2 children)

I'm afraid you're thinking of Seventh Day Adventists, who were the result of the 1844 Great Disappointment of the Millerite movement after the predicted apocalypse didn't happen.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Disappointment

Now here's the truly weird part:

Members of the Baháʼí Faith believe that Miller's interpretation of signs and dates of the coming of Jesus were, for the most part, correct.[39] They believe that the fulfillment of biblical prophecies of the coming of Christ came through a forerunner of their own religion, the Báb, who declared that he was the "Promised One" on May 23, 1844, and began openly teaching in Persia in October 1844.[40][41] Several Baháʼí books and pamphlets make mention of the Millerites, the prophecies used by Miller and the Great Disappointment, most notably Baháʼí follower William Sears' Thief in the Night.[42][43][44]

It was noted that the year AD 1844 was also the Year AH 1260. Sears tied Daniel's prophecies in with the Book of Revelation in the New Testament in support of Baháʼí teaching, interpreting the year 1260 as the "times, time and half a time" of Daniel 7:25 (3 and 1/2 years = 42 months = 1,260 days). Using the same day-year principle as did William Miller, Sears decoded these texts into the year AH 1260, or 1844.[42]

It is believed by Baháʼís that if William Miller had known the year 1844 was also the year AH 1260, then he may have considered that there were other signs to look for. The Baháʼí interpretation of chapters 11 and 12 of the Book of Revelation, together with the predictions of Daniel, were explained by 'Abdu'l-Bahá, the son of the founder of the Baháʼí Faith, to Laura Clifford Barney and published in 1908 in Chapters 10, 11 and 13 of "Some Answered Questions". The explanation provided in Chapter 10 draws on the same biblical verses that William Miller used, and comes to the same conclusion about the year in which to expect the 'cleansing of the sanctuary' which was interpreted by 'Abdu'l-Bahá to be the 'dawn' of a new 'Revelation' – AD 1844.[citation needed]

[–] [email protected] 2 points 21 minutes ago

The two are interrelated. Charles Taze Russel (founder of what is now called the Jehovah's Witnesses) was associated with the Millerites. Lots of their doctrine was copied from the 7th Day Adventists, including the numerology of the timeline that gets them to 1914 as "the" year. That one was supposed to be just a step along the way, but after WWI happened, it was a lot of pointing and saying "see, we predicted something big would happen".

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

I'm thoroughly impressed. Not many know about The Baha'is.

Thanks for the clarification on the 7th Day Adventists

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Shit! I had it all wrong! Okay but now that the rapture is over and not gonna happen anymore, then maybe everyone can go back to their regularly scheduled Friday?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 hours ago

The rapture probably did happen but nobody on earth was worthy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

ah fuck i missed the rapture again. guys how was it?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Kind of boring actually.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 hours ago

I would get letters from my grandma - long, winding beseeching me to come to the Lord or whatever, with often a specific date predicted in the near future of the end times. I never kept them because I was embarrassed. She was lonely and mentally ill, and probably trying to manipulate people into visiting her, but she also believed the shit she was saying, even though it kept changing, IMO.

I think that's a little bit of what is going on with these signs

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

According to their own book, no man will know the day or the hour IIRC. So anyone who says they know, at all, is by default wrong, and you can guarantee that it won't happen at that time.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 hour ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

The ~~Jehovah's Witnesses~~ 7th Day Adventists figured out that it was supposed to happen in 1844. According to The Baha'is, they were right but wrong at the same time.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 hours ago

Oh come on! I was gonna get a haircut today.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 hours ago

He's got the wrong date.

To quote late musician Peter Steele:

April 2029, the final time The end my friends is not near, the hour in fact is quite here ... It's a Friday 13th of course you won't live, to see noon. ... Are you paranoid what's on the asteroid has got your name tattooed on it? This stone's called Apophis And it brings apocalypse.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

There were 666 likes to this post. I ruined it by turning it to 667!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 hours ago

Do we need any more proof that the rapture is over and we missed it?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 hours ago

Shouldn't have taken that nap.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 hours ago

wordington rapture

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

I didn’t get raptured, too much thc and alcohol in your system makes you too heavy for the angels to carry I think.

If all the good folk are gone though I sure hope for less traffic on my road trip this weekend. Praise jeebus? 🤷‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 hours ago

May you be toughed by thy Noodley appendage! - FIFY

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

I think the rapture happened a decade ago and this is hell

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Everyone is a sinner. Especially the religious types.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 hours ago

I hope it's during work hour. Would be shame to do whole days work just to get eaten by the rising dead.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 10 hours ago

God, I wish God would actually just end this cringe already.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

Oh please yes!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

Haha! Yeah right, this is like the ten thousandth time they've s

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago

Oh no, they were raptured mid-sentence! How nice of the angels to hit send before dragging them away.

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