this post was submitted on 29 Feb 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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all 25 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 62 points 8 months ago

This doesn't read as flirting to me.

You're being too subtle, try to be more obvious about your interest.

[–] CameronDev 48 points 8 months ago (1 children)

"Sorry, that was meant for my mum"

[–] [email protected] 28 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I'll try it and report back

edit: doesn't seem to work

[–] [email protected] 26 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Ausam bobs! Show bobs and vegana!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago

free uggs and ipad

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Too much focus on boobies, you need to also mention vagina

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

But you gotta say it like "I bet 💵 U got da biggest vagene eva! Fit more bros than a 🏟️!"

Girls love being told they have a gigantic vagina that multiple guys use at once!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Bigger vagene, noted!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I see the problem.

You didn't mention her huge mammaries enough.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

real blubber udders

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Isn't that the other person replying to you?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Don't think about it, it's not fake

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago

I wasn't suggesting it was fake at all!

It's written black on white like the Bible, how can it be fake?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Helo baby jirl. Plz send bobs and vagene

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

Are you really the police?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 8 months ago

More police cars and maybe some titty emoticons if you could find something big and round.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Turn your phone off before taking ambien

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago

Start taking ambien, noted!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

You should flirt with her mom instead. The jealousy will throw her into your embrace. I saw it in a.. documentary.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

"GORDON, LOOKOUT. HOTTED BOONS UP AHEAD. TITS, BIG ONES."