this post was submitted on 05 May 2025
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I think a lot about how we as a culture have turned “forever” into the only acceptable definition of success.

Like... if you open a coffee shop and run it for a while and it makes you happy but then stuff gets too expensive and stressful and you want to do something else so you close it, it’s a “failed” business. If you write a book or two, then decide that you don’t actually want to keep doing that, you're a “failed” writer. If you marry someone, and that marriage is good for a while, and then stops working and you get divorced, it’s a “failed” marriage.

The only acceptable “win condition” is “you keep doing that thing forever”. A friendship that lasts for a few years but then its time is done and you move on is considered less valuable or not a “real” friendship. A hobby that you do for a while and then are done with is a “phase” - or, alternatively, a “pity” that you don’t do that thing any more. A fandom is “dying” because people have had a lot of fun with it but are now moving on to other things.

| just think that something can be good, and also end, and that thing was still good. And it’s okay to be sad that it ended, too. But the idea that anything that ends is automatically less than this hypothetical eternal state of success... I don’t think that’s doing us any good at all.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 22 hours ago

Leave it to the Internet to be the best (and worst) of all.

I'm at best a poser punk but the diy ethos always rung true. That said one of my favourite places online is a local old school punk forum. It's niche enough that with its own problems there's still a community.

In my experience that's kind of what an online community needs to be. Not exclusive, but niche enough. I too used to be on Reddit, got there when the great Digg migration happened. Those days it was small enough to have have a community on some subreddits. Gradually it got the point that when I'd read the article or had a reasonable thought about the question there were 11000 replies and anything worthwhile was already said.

These days Lemmy feels kinda similar to the old Reddit. Maybe things stay the same or maybe they change and there'll be another place I log on.

All that said, what OP posted is profound. What you posted is too.