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How would you deal with right wing parents? (lemmy.world)

submitted 19 hours ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

81 comments fedilink hide all child comments

For some context, we are first generation immigrants. My parents are Russian, my mother and her husband have been living here for 20 years (even got rid of Russian citizenship couple years ago), my biological father is still living in Russia.

It's damn exhausting to discuss political topics with them, especially my father. He keeps telling me how great it is to live in Russia, how their economy is doing great and how he's proud that they are defending their "brothers" in Donezk and Luhansk from the evil bandera regime in Ukraine.

My mom voted far right in the past election. She doesn't believe she voted for nazis, but the party's views on economics, climate policy and immigration seem to align with hers. She believes wind farms are harmful for the environment. What the actual fuck.

Whenever I try to argue with them, they tell me that I've been brainwashed by "Western propaganda".

I'm at a loss. I love my parents and I know that nobody's immune to propaganda, but it's heartbreaking to see them holding these toxic beliefs. How would you deal with parents like these? Should I just declare to never talk about politics with them again since it's pointless?

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

My therapist made a really great point when I brought up this exact issue with him. He asked if I value a relationship with my parents, and I said yes. Then he said that the price you have to pay for having a relationship with them, is never discussing politics.

It worked for a year or so, but then they voted for that rapist again, and I've since cut them out of my life. I'm not walking around on the eggshells of their bigotry and ignorance just so I can get some semblance of what some may describe as affection. You can only say/do so many shitty terrible things before I'm just done with you completely, and they hit their limit, so it was time to cash out.

Sorry, my advice of ignoring politics only works for a little while.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

If you don't mind me asking, how often did politics come up with your parents?

Edit: just for my own perspective, they came up a little with my father while he was still alive and very, very rarely with my mother who I still see daily. I gently gauge the political position that my kids have but I've raised them all with empathy as a central tenet of their upbringing so that's more or less where they tend to fall as best I can tell.

I am not interested in ending up where you did and I mean that with kindness.