this post was submitted on 24 Jul 2023
309 points (97.0% liked)

Ask Lemmy

27042 readers
1230 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions

Please don't post about US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected]


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

34 years old with two kids.

I spent my 20s working like a horse, and I eventually bought a nice house in a quiet town. I had enough money to go on vacation to Mexico every year with my wife and my kids. Basically, I was living the American dream.

Fast forward a few years later. My wife tells me that she wants a divorce and she is dating the guy she told me not to worry about. Getting divorced means that 50% of my assets go to her, and I need to sell my house. Child support leaves me with little money left at the the of the month.

So, how do I feel? Not bad at all, actually. Have I lost a wife? No, she has been returned. Have I lost my possessions? No, they have been returned.

My children are healthy. They have a good relationship with me and their mother, and they have everything that they need. I am grateful for this. Then, I am aware that they could be taken from me anytime (e.g. sickness). You have to learn how to control your expectations.

As for the future, well whatever that I decide to set my mind to, I will do so with diligence. I'm currently trying to come up with programming projects to keep myself busy. Who knows? I could hit pay dirt, eventually (or not).

Living according to Nature is what I strive for. Everything else is irrelevant.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I'm your age. Basically the same story minus the family. I sometimes regret being alone. It sucks. But I don't think I could handle a women shacking up with someone else and expecting me to pay her. Guess the grass is always greener.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's okay to be upset about these things. Taking a "life goes on" approach to people who walked all over you is not healthy.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I was upset at first. Human beings have emotions and it's perfectly fine to feel them. You just have to make sure that they don't control you.