this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2024
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I’m new to the bidet scene, and this one has me slightly confounded. Should I install a new towel rack next to the toilet? Should my wife and I share the towel? Do you wipe first? There are so many unanswered questions in the ways of bidet-ing!

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago (14 children)

This has always disturbed me. As a non-bidet user, when I have used them (a dozen or so times) an additional final sweep has definitely been required. And yet so many bidet users are adamant everything is magically 100% clean. I now just assume they're walking around oblivious to a spot of wet mud peppered around the rim of their margherita.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 5 months ago (1 children)

People are different, some folks are hairy, some folks aren't. I am unclear as to why this is "disturbing".

[–] [email protected] -1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

My hot take is that everyone should be shaving their asshole, maybe even their crack. If your ass looks like someone slammed a wig in a suitcase, you need to trim that shit before extruding play-doh though it.

You cannot get that hair 100% clean, especially if shit dries in it.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

You wash your ass every time you take a shit, even when at work? :P

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Most people shit the same time every day. If you just nudge your shit cycle to be right before your daily shower then all this hassle goes away

[–] [email protected] 17 points 5 months ago

I think of it as being (sorta) similar to spraying and wiping down a dirty countertop. The spray alone isn't going to get it fully clean, but it makes the wipe about a thousand times more effective at finishing the job.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago (1 children)

It's certainly much cleaner than just spreading it with paper...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Which is like trying to wipe peanut butter off a counter top with just a dry paper towel.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago

If you have mud, your gi tract is not as healthy as it could be. Bidets are not designed to clean Peanut butter of carpet

[–] [email protected] 10 points 5 months ago

Oof what a visual

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

You should advertise for a tutor.

Seriously, this is NOT difficult.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

You have created a mental image that cannot be undone. I hope you're happy.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

It took me a little bit to figure out, but it’s all about the “aim” of the spray. If you’re not positioned just right, it might not be washing the area completely. But when it does, it’s so satisfying seeing a clean piece of wet tp.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

I personally can feel it if the water went everywhere and enough. I never had brown on the tp afterwards. You probably don't wash long enough or too low preassure or no movement, etc.

I can see that for a beginner there are things to figure out on how to use it efficiently. Sa.e as beginner of tp usage.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

Depends on the nozzle size and whether you get one that oscillates, not all are built equally. Mine is always sparkling. Can confirm this on another person, as a corollary of dating, haha.

My bidet has enough power to strip spraypaint off concrete, lol.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

I suppose it depends if you are using it correctly or not. I've used a bidet all my life, and where i live bidets are a separate bowl from the toilet, made from the same materials, and virtually every household has one. I've never had a problem of it not cleaning enough

EDIT: Here's an image. You can see the bidet has a kind of jet of water coming upwards with force, exactly below where you would sit. You can regulate the intensity and if done properly you can clean yourself completely https://images.app.goo.gl/6w3EMWrAk34DBwJd7

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

My experience has been that it makes the perimeter squeaky-clean, but obviously with a finger, you can do some digging. And if you dig deep enough, there's always going to be mud.

And also in my experience, this digging doesn't actually help. You've got a great gate down there. If the outside of that gate is clean, you're clean. Digging out from behind that gate doesn't do much, because new mud will push up against it pretty soon.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

You bidet it clean enough, then use your hand to wash your backside, then dry.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 5 months ago (2 children)

What, and I can't stress this enough, the fuck?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

Is it?

Are we in one of these social media posts where we rediscover that a bunch of people have not been washing their bums in the shower for their entire lives and we have to carry on living with that knowledge?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (1 children)

Yes. Wash your hands, wash your ass isn't as common as you might expect in North America. It also isn't just a "Muslim thing" as you point towards. That invalidates Muslim beliefs and customs as well as reducing the pervasive and varying global cultural etiquettes around cleaning one's self after bodily functions. A wide swath of north americans are only taught the toilet paper wipe bit.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Hey, I do get that bidets aren't culturally well established everywhere, and even in bidet areas they don't often come with detailed instructions, so usage habits are kinda random.

But that's why I went to the shower bit instead. I would hope cleaning your nethers when you shower is a universal habit, or at least as much of one as washing your hands after a trip to the toilet.

But hey, maybe permanently sweaty, poopy undercarriages are just... you know, "an American thing"? I don't know.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

Showers, bidets, ass rags, tp, hands, whatever combination follows the wash your hands, wash your ass ethos to get the job done. Your skin will thank you.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (2 children)

This is not about the shower. There's different kinds of bidets. Some just sprinkle your nether regions. Others are a full-blown sink for you to scrub yourself. And yet others are the so-called "bum guns", where you've got a hose next to your toilet to sploosh it away.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

bum guns are the...

shit.

(••) , ( ••)>⌐■-■ , (⌐■_■)

YEEEEAAAHH!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Water on your bum is water on your bum. If the caveat is that magical built-in bidets don't need a scrub (as much), why is your reply to my post and not the "muslim thing" guy? Wouldn't it apply equally to both?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

I just thought, you got confused, because you mentioned the shower. I figured, maybe you're not aware of the bidets where one can reasonably wash their whole bums. If you weren't confused, then carry on. 🙃

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

This is the case with many countries where toilet paper is cheap and shitty and will clog the hundred years old shared plumbing systems which probably drains into the same system as the rainwater drainage. They still have plumbing systems, though, so some form of bidet is still viable. So, wash with your left, eat with your right, as is common in india. Not too big of a problem, I'd say, so long as you have soap and water to wash your hand afterwards and you do a thorough job, and maybe also have a diet where you're not shitting your brains out every time, and maybe also have a shaved asshole or something, but yeah.