this post was submitted on 28 May 2025
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

Obese woman: I AM DISPLEASED!!!

Lover number 2 scurries in, head low eyes darting around: yes milord

Obese woman: bring me 6's head on a pike, but do it... Slowly.

Lover 2: yes milord backs into the shadows quietly.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (4 children)

The headline seems to imply that the real news is that the "Obese woman" has FIVE lovers

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Its always a huge hit to the self esteem when you see people like this with many lovers and I can't even get a date.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

These folks aren’t interested in a date. Depraved sex is to them what collecting old video games is to me.

It’s just a hobby, and they aren’t usually picky or they can’t afford their hobby.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

You can get a date, if you lower to standards to anyone. No shade, but are you looking to hit up Ms. "obese, unhygienic, multiple kid having, dirty house and stinky 🐱?" Not saying that you should, but if you accept anything, you'll get anything.

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[–] [email protected] 165 points 5 days ago (8 children)

Me wondering what obese has to do with it... "Dailymail" oh... Got it.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 4 days ago

Also the bold all caps FIVE... Like, can you beleive an obese person can have multiple people interested in them?

[–] [email protected] 45 points 5 days ago

Somehow it follows us from FB to Twitter to Reddit to here.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I read the article and have no idea

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Two of the men have the same last name and are 26 years apart in age. Are they father and son?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Short answer: yes

Long answer: also yes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Thanks for explaining that.

[–] [email protected] 116 points 5 days ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 104 points 5 days ago (3 children)

People who wear orange 😍

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 days ago
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[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 days ago

Stay classy Daily Heil.

[–] [email protected] 75 points 5 days ago (18 children)

She has all her stat points in Charisma.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 days ago

I'm tempted to say: "you do see the same guys i'm seeing?" Doesn't take a lot of charisma, she seems to have caught a bundle of lost souls and used them.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Bottom right had bits of Adrien Brody DNA. Bottom middle had bits of Guillermo del Toro. Husband, maybe Geico Caveman? Top two, I got nothing. Top-middle is like Wish.com Kurt Cobain, maybe. Top-right kinda looks like a former professor of mine, but that's not helpful.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Top right reminded me of someone, I’ve been racking my brain for the last couple of hours and finally figured it out.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

For all, that's Dennis Franz (Captain Lorenzo from Die Hard 2), not porn hedgehog Ron Jeremy, though he would be a much better example for the guys above.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

Maybe guy above is a Jeremy/Franz love child

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

Nice, good call. Also maybe this guy:

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Top right Ricky Gervais maybe?

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 days ago

You, too, can be in a polyamorous relationship if you get on meth. Woohoo!

[–] [email protected] 26 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (8 children)

The guy on the bottom right is the only one actually nailing that look.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 5 days ago (1 children)

My fat ass thinking "wow really?! How?!"

then I saw the men... no thanks

[–] [email protected] 33 points 5 days ago (2 children)

It appears she chooses quantity over quality.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 5 days ago

the men chose quantity instead of quality too, in a sense

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 5 days ago (3 children)
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[–] [email protected] 15 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I hate to read the daily mail, and can only apologise for linking to it but the story is great.

They kept him in a motel for a week, before letting him visit a store where he contacted someone who contacted his mum, to come rescue him ...

The victim was rescued only when his captors allowed him a brief trip to a nearby Speedway convenience store on March 21, as reported by FOX8.

During the moment of freedom, he managed to make contact with someone who then alerted his mother.

'When he was there, he made contact with an individual, who got in contact with the victim's mother,' Sprow explained.
His mother immediately rushed to the Red Roof Inn to rescue her son, and police were called to the scene.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14555247/Obese-woman-FIVE-lovers-ordered-abduct-torture-sixth-man-whod-displeased-her.html

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

In response to the comment in the screenshot.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

husband looks like if an Amish guy was super into Linkin Park

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