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Don't be cool, be good.
Live like a dog: if you can't eat it or fuck it, piss on it and walk away
"I'm a problem-solver."
If you wait till the last minute.. then it only takes a minute.
Know that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good
nice, I often live by: "you don't need to be smart, to be useful."
"If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy!"
hey! I resemble that...
That's a good one!
Be the kind of friend/parent/mentor, etc. that you would like to have.
"I'm not worried about it".
If you have a problem, you can either fix it or you can't. If you can fix it, fix it, problem gone. If you can't fix it, worrying just gives you an additional problem.
Thanks to death, there is no permanent suffering.
Get lost and leave us in peace.
It was always live hard, die young, and leave a beautiful corpse, but now that I'm older I can only manage one of those :/
"Life is a joke of cosmic proportions."
Suffering exists just because. People who don't deserve it live lives of comfort and decadence. There's no rhyme or reason to life. And the punchline isn't even apparent to any of us.
Can't fix it? Fuck it!
Do what comes easy.*
*That’s career advice. If you do what you love for money, you will soon hate it.
This too shall pass. It may pass like a damn kidney stone, but it’ll pass.