this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] [email protected] 86 points 2 months ago (2 children)

In other words: Coca-cola doesn't have a million to burn like the other oligarchs but wants to make Donny Two-Scoops feel like their special boy.

[–] [email protected] 71 points 2 months ago

In other words, Coca-Cola realized that they don't need to spend $1 million dollars, they can just slap "Special Boy" on a bottle for 6 cents and achieve the same result.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 months ago

You don't think the coca cola company has a million to burn?

THE COCA COLA COMPANY?!!

They just know that donny will lap this tat up and ask for seconds

[–] [email protected] 53 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You know every time he does something, someone in the comments makes an idiocracy reference and we all roll our eyes because "Yeah, theres the low hanging fruit guy coming to farm votes" like its an original thought.

Well... Its my turn.

"This Inauguration brought to you by Diet coke. DIET COKE, IF YOU DONT DRINK IT FUCK YOU!"

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago

Except Idiocracy didn’t go far enough. Drumph isn’t going to walk around saying he’s sponsored by Coca-Cola, Coca-Cola is going to go around saying they’re sponsored by him.

“The Coca-Cola Company, sponsored by Donald Trump. Donald Trump - Fuck you!”

[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Did Coke just call him fat?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago

It was diet Coke

It is basically health food

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Can coca cola please gift him more non-diet cokes so he can get diabeetus and die

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Or just Diet Coke laced with polonium.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 2 months ago

That's kind of a terrible thing to say. I wouldn't wish death or diabetes on anyone.

With that being said, Coke and Pepsi are slowly killing America

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago

I saw the community this was posted in and my brain somehow removed the "not" in "not the Onion". I was like "haha, oh the Onion. They still got it."

Then I looked at the community again...

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

This is great

People here get way to up in arms when Trump is mentioned. Just enjoy the stupidity of the world.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

LBJ had a special button installed that would summon someone to bring him a Fresca.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

Bring him a Tab Clear

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

I have a suggestion as to where he can put it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Fucking bootlicking piece of ass

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago

As much as I want to call out bootlickers, it would honestly be weirder if they didn't continue the tradition.

Headline might as well be "Trump first president to prefer Diet Coke."

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

"I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke."