this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2023
51 points (100.0% liked)

Chat

7483 readers
24 users here now

Relaxed section for discussion and debate that doesn't fit anywhere else. Whether it's advice, how your week is going, a link that's at the back of your mind, or something like that, it can likely go here.


Subcommunities on Beehaw:


This community's icon was made by Aaron Schneider, under the CC-BY-NC-SA 4.0 license.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

They took off on their bike earlier and when they came back I asked where they'd been. They gave me an odd answer and I smelled a rat. I pointed out the inconsistencies and still they doubled down on the "why don't you trust me". I was unwell with worry at this point, I didn't know what to expect.

I don't advocate for going through people's data but I was a little bit insane at this point and I needed to know what was going on, consequences be damned. So after they fell asleep I looked at their phone. The last app that had been opened was 2good2go. The fucker had gone and picked up a free burrito without me and tried to hide it from me 🀣

What does it all mean?? Should I confront them or let it slide??

top 25 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A free burrito can make a man do crazy things.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Clearly!! I'd do crazy things for a burrito too, maybe that's why they kept it a secret πŸ€”

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Is he supposed to be on a diet or something? Why hide a burrito?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What kind of a world are we living in where someone can't just get something to eat? No wonder the guy is out there stress eating burritos, he was panicking that she'd find out he'd had a whole calzone to himself for lunch and only got her a limp sandwich.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

They fucking love calzones too hahahaa. Thanks for this thread guys, I am seeing the funny side to it all! Relationships are hard, at least they're funny sometimes to make up for it

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No diet that I'm aware of, so hiding it from me doesn't make sense from that POV. Maybe they just didn't want to share??

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Maybe they just needed time alone.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Yeah they've needed a lot of that recently. Been some other issues going on in their life that I'm trying to support them through but we definitely deal with pain in different ways. I'm an open book whereas they're very quiet. Maybe this was a therapeutic burrito. I hope so.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Sometimes introverts gotta introvert.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Aren't all burritos therapeutic burritos?

You sound like a loving and understanding partner.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Seems like quite an unhealthy relationship if you don't trust him and went through his phone. It seems like he would be right not to trust you.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, there are a couple issues here. First being that they felt the need to hide the burrito from their partner, and the other one being that their partner had violated privacy by going through their phone without consent.

No win scenario, honestly. Sit and stew that they didn't trust you with the food info or confront and watch the situation explode as you reveal you didn't trust them more.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah fuck thank you for commenting this because you're dead right about that last point. I felt possessed, I needed to know what was happening because I just knew they were lying. But going through their phone isn't a trustworthy way of verifying that.

As I mentioned below, I am SO relieved that it was a burrito and nothing else. I just find the lying so weird.

They're the one who complains about me ordering fast food too! Maybe that's why they hid it, so they wouldn't seem hypocritical??

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yeah, that's probably the reason if they give you crap about it like that. Honestly, it seems like a great thing to work out in couples therapy. Having a neutral mediator there might go a long way. Idk your situation or how much that makes sense (more sense for marriage, less so for dating). But there's a line of communication somewhere that's been broken and needs to be mended to move forward. Best of luck OP.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

We're working through some stuff right now for sure. I'm just so glad it was a burrito

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't think I could forgive my husband if he got a free burrito and didn't share it with me.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Divorce it is so 🀣

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

It’s going to be a challenge to figure out who gets what half of the burrito.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Please do not go through s/o's phone

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

There's a lot to unpack in this scenario, but without knowing anything about previous trust issues in your relationship or any shame or other feelings your partner may have towards food/weight/body image, I think it comes down to that we are all need private moments in our lives to maintain our sanity.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Delete Facebook, hit the gym, lawyer up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I worked from the office during Donut Day (June 2nd, dunno who decided that); later in the evening, I'm chilling and playing TotK when my partner comes up to me, clearly feeling guilty of something, and admits that while I was gone they went to Krispy Kreme for a free donut. admittedly I can get a little possessive over food, but hey I was just glad at least one of us got to enjoy a free donut! πŸ˜‚

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I believe I’d ask where is mine?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I can't tell if this is a joke post but my honest two cents is that you both have trust issues and there are some major red flags from you both. Your partner should not be worried about telling you where he was or what he was doing, and you should not be distrusting to the point that you're going through his phone. Especially over a burrito.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Not going to lie, you had me in the first half. Well played.

load more comments
view more: next β€Ί