this post was submitted on 16 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 133 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

No-one said he doesn't let the homies hit his ass, he's just saying if he had a pussy they could hit that too

[–] CameronDev 72 points 1 month ago (3 children)

If he bends over the donuts will fall off

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago

Thats why it's wider at the front

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

Not if the tip is pierced

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The real life pro tip is always in the comments.

What about missionary, though?

[–] CameronDev 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I guess you'd get donut sugar in your belly button? But if your already heading down the road of fucking donuts, that might not be a concern.

Probably get ants though.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Probably get ants though.

You have saved me from all kinds of trouble with your sensible warnings. I did not think this through well enough.

If I might trouble you further, o wise one, how about up against the shed wall, each in a pair of welly boots, standing in a paddling pool half full of water?

[–] CameronDev 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Wellys?! You sick degenerate fuck. Safe sex with the homies starts and ends with Crocs.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Oh, you're right. Crocs are much, much easier to wash.

See, everyone should plan their sexcapades on lemmy, you get very high quality advice.

Oh, wait, wait, I just thought of something. BRB.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I’m conflicted (and addicted)…

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago

Voodoo Donuts in Portland used to have a contest for stacking donuts on your peen.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The brojob is always available too!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Kind of you to offer. When can you get round?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Oh shit, that was meant to be a dm.

Never mind. Own it. Own it.

Yeah, I've got nothing to be ashamed of.... No, no, that's not always true, post-nut clarity and all that.

Er, we all have needs, and sometimes... No, no, that's a bit entitled.

A mouth's a mouth, and what two consenting adults get up to in their garden shed is of no concern to anyone. Yeah.

Just as long as its out of view of the window so Mrs Stephenson next door doesn't get a bit of a surprise when she weeds the rose bed.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I think either women are over estimating the size of donut holes or they are not getting satisfaction in pillow fun time.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

and the length of dicks

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How many donuts could You stack on before You are unable to reach the asshole? Just wondering.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Depends on the thickness of the donut and the butt cheeks. So probably less than one.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Are you boasting about your phat ass, or is it just such a mighty bubble butt that it would pop anything else that got near it?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

On reflection, I think I'm posting too much in this thread.

I'm not sure what it means. I'll talk it over with my shrink on Tuesday.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

LOL. Also, it wouldn't be my ass since I'm the donut stacker.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Ah. Uhhh. Um, can I interest you in, like, a LOT more doughnuts?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's okay, I'll eat your dick doughnuts. Does it come with cream?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

I mean, it depends, dude, it depends.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago