this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2024
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Science Memes

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[–] [email protected] 81 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Not to alarm anyone, but unless you're doing the 100m in around 11s or less, current large crocodiles are still faster than you. But if you're fit enough to keep the speed going, you should outlast them over short enough distance.

And if you can't do any of that, well you'll have to run lateral to it and hope your agility out maneouvers them.

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 months ago (5 children)

Mythbusters tested whether it was better to zig zag or run straight away from a gator. Turns out, it doesn't matter, gators won't chase you.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They've spent hundreds of millions of years sitting in lakes waiting for food to step in their mouths. They deserve to be called sloths more than actual sloths.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Or that you have the adequate weapons on you, the knowledge and physical ability to use them properly.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

chootem inna hed nah boa!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

Serpentine!

[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Just so ya know, a regular modern day crocodile can also outrun you on land.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 months ago

Yeah, but only because I'm American

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Yeah but I would easily beat him in hurdles.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

This is true. Or running serpentine:

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

"He only has a brain the size of a walnut."

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Should be Land of the Lost (2009) if Reverse Image Search isn't failing me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Don't even get me started on the pole vault

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 months ago

A mighty steed!

You cannot prove that humans didn't ride these into battle.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Alligators can already outrun a person on land.

They just choose not to. Because they're lazy and they don't like running after their prey.

I suspect the same was probably true of whatever it was we killed off back then too.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Flat solid land? Nah, person wins on any distance over a few feet.

Through brush and marsh? Nobody beats the gator.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (3 children)

That's not true. And another one.

TL;DR;

They can run up to 35mph over short (20-30ft) distances. Then they can run at a slightly slower (though faster than most humans) pace for a sustained period of roughly 100 feet (30ish meters for the non-'mericans).

In every scenario they can and will catch every human on earth except an Olympic sprinter. And even then, it wouldn't be a comfortable race for them.

The reason they don't chase you down and eat you on land, is because they've evolved to be ambush predators from water transitions to land. They are lazy. Simple as that. And their food comes to them in most cases. Why would they want to spend all those calories just to maybe get a un-tasty human? They conserve energy so they can perform several ambush attempts for prey, rather than one long chase.

In the end, their current approach gets them more calories for the efforts, which is why they've evolved that way.

But they can, on paper, absolutely wipe the floor with you in a sprint over solid, flat land. For 100 feet.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

You should try reading your source...

"Experts say the American alligator’s top running speed clocks in at 11mph."

I a fat outta shape slouch, but I think in a life or death situation I could manage 11mph for a few minutes.

Sure they can burst a good bit of speed, but that 20-30 ft sprint mostly comes from them lunging with all 4 legs and their tail as hard as they can and then maybe 1 or 2 more lunges and some scrabbling.

It's mainly a matter of weight and gait. They got stubby little side protruding legs and they weight a ton incomparison to their leg musculature. They can high walk for a good distance, and they can gallop, but only for a few steps.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago

Usain Bolt's fastest recorded speed is 27.79 mph.

Unless you can dust the fastest man on Earth in a footrace, you're gonna be a snack.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Not a lot of people can run 11mph for any distance, though.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Fun fact, the reason dragons appear in literally every culture that developed language came from people surviving horrific encounters with enormous crocodiles.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

But is that a fact

(it's not)

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

hairy crocodile? artistic liberty?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Looks like they photoshopped a crocodile onto a bear

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

lol, i wasn't paying attention clearly

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Gee, I wonder why those died out.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Yeah, who are they calling apex predator, take a look around.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

More like ape-ex amirite

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Yes but only once

[–] MagicShel 6 points 3 months ago

Sure, li'l buddy! He's coming quick, so I'm just going to run over there to take a picture.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Yes, first you pet them on the outside, then you pet them on the inside.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago

Steve Irwin would still have fed them.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

Crocodoggo! 😍

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh shit, sadam is that you?

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

All those "dragon types" charts you see call this a drake. I don't really get that because drakes are ducks.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

But according to those charts, ducks are wyverns...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Be the change you want to see.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

I can barely take care of myself

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

invents bazooka

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