this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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I really hope they fully cooked that takoyaki I ate....

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

So's coffee what's your point?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago

Stop it, you'll make me cum

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago

what kind of octopus are we talking? How big?

It's a known fact that as long as their mouth fits through the hole, the rest will follow, but it must be pretty small for it to move through your entire GI tract.

Now the spooky thing is that it's probably intelligent enough to do it, assuming it doesn't die somewhere along the way.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Could it survive the stomach acid?

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago

And that's why you should never trust an octopus.

You wouldn't see us squid doing anything like that. Ick.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago

Or, the other way around 😉

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

New torture method unlocked 🔓🧠🤯

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Stop, please. I can only get so erect.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

a small one could probably go up that too

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure there's japanese porn on this exact theme

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Not just porn, but classic art by a famous artist. Check out Hokusai's "The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife."

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Flexible enough? Sure.

But will it withstand my stomach acids?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Bro, it lives underwater, in the ocean, where there's sharks and shit. It doesn't care about your stomach acid.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

It lives in water with salt. The average ocean pH value is 8.1. It's a brain coated with a thin bit of goo.

My stomach is about 1.5 pH.

You could easily go through a waterslide, but if I change the water to be hydrochloric acid, you're not gonna come out as fresh as you went in. And most skin on the face and body has a pH of between 4.7 and 5.75.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

In addition, pH is a logarithmic scale, a pH of 3 is 10x more acidic than pH 4

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

Holy crap, I never knew that!

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

"This is my hole!"

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It’s called octopussying and you NORMOS and vegans STAY AWAY from OUR KINKCOMMUNITY (/s)

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Pretty sure that's not true...

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

If they weren't too big or have to swim through all the digestive juices, it would be entirely possible

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I mean, some octopodes are pretty small. The real issue is them moving through the GI tract. They might be flexible enough, but propelling themselves forward consistently would be the real feat.

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Hey, if we can make a pencil out of leaves, cephalopods can swim through our GI tract like species 8472 through fluidic space.

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yes, you can enter an octopus' mouth, wriggle around through its digestive tract, and exit their anus. And when you're done, you can eat the octopus shreds from it popping like a you-filled balloon.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Thanks to you my search history now contains octopus anus.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Vs the usual octopus in anus or octopus anus insertion?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’m pretty sure 90% of search histories have an octopus in anus variant in them.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

90% of my search history is animal anuses.

While I'm totally joking, I for realsies create calendars filled with pictures of animal's butts that I take at the zoo

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

Username checks out.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

That's one of my favorite episodes. I felt so understood. I started taking pictures of animals' butts when I mistimed a pic of a hippo swimming by. I was so amused that it was unlike any other photo you'd normally see of a hippo, but you knew it was a hippo. So I expanded to other animals.

After one trip, I mentioned to my family that I got photos of over 14 animals' butts and my sister said "great, you can make a calendar now." And so it all began.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure I've read that hentai.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Octo-Diddy Where Art Thou?

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

It was originally the colonmari

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

After sticking a feather in its hat, presumably.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

Sounds like the digestive system works

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

That's just great! Now I want that :(

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

That beak is going to hurt like a mother, though.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

No one said it wouldn't be painful lol

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

TIL what that Coldplay song is about.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

The Willie Nelson cover is much better, imo

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

Beaked for your pleasure

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I have a stomach ache and this is not helping

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 weeks ago

Scareoused?

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