this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
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Political Weirdos

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[–] [email protected] 96 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 98 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

7.74 inches was my favorite hint that it is satire.

[–] [email protected] 50 points 3 weeks ago (6 children)

You don't measure your penis with a digital depth gauge?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 weeks ago

Only when sounding

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Everybody knows real men measure their penises in metric

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

The meta joke (sorry for my German accent)

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah, exactly. This is pure satire.

That it's near indistinguishable from reality at this point, is a tragedy.

[–] towerful 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Implied +/- 10 thou accuracy isn't appropriate.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

In my case, that would be the difference between nonexistence or double size.

[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Measuring your penis down to the hundredth of an inch; totally not insecure at all.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Lists penis length to hundredths of an inch, won't list height, only posts selfies of himself sitting down.

[–] dudinax 22 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

It's clear from the text he's 5'7"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago

This is clever, I had to look again and literally laughed out loud when I saw it.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

One thing turning people off is certainly that they're imagining they have hundreths of an inch accuracy instead of just writing 7 3/4.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 weeks ago

The more accurate the number looks the more realer it is! That's stience, you rube!

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 3 weeks ago (9 children)

The fuck is atlanto-mediterannean ?

[–] [email protected] 62 points 3 weeks ago

He wants to say he’s white, but not one of those swarthy Greeks or Italians that make his bloodline impure.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 weeks ago

sigh he's from Atlantis

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

If I remember right, there are only 3 countries that have coastlines at the Mediterranean Sea AND the Atlantic ocean. Spain, France and Morocco.

My guess is, he uses such a weird definition because he is North African but wants to highlight his not being brown, because that doesn't go well with his white supremacy.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

all three of those being famous for their pale complexions, of course.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Doesn't matter because nobody is applying to be his girlfriend.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

Oooo that true. Don't forget the Rock.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 weeks ago

There's a certain level of racist that gets really involved in classifying humans into small subcategories so they can know how racist they should be to each one. Used to be popular with "scientific racism" in the 19th century, but you don't see it much anymore.

It's extra weird.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 weeks ago

If I had to guess, after seeing this weird shit and watching too much pseudo-archaology debunking stuff lately: he means the descendants of the Mediterranean and Atlantian people. There's a crazy group of people who think Atlantis is real, and either had a worldwide advanced culture, or at least through the Mediterranean.

The Atlantis myth was heavily accepted by the Nazis as the ancestors of the Aryan people, which is why the Aryans are "so much better" than everyone else. It is still a popular tool to belittle ancient people and to say their accomplishments had to be done instead by this white Atlantian group instead.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 weeks ago
[–] dudinax 4 points 3 weeks ago

It means one of their grandparents is from Italy, otherwise it'd be "Northern European".

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I refuse to believe this isn't a hilarious joke account.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah this shit reads like an onion article lol

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

Probably, but then, there are people out there that would unironically post shit like this.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

Anyone here ever play Disco Elysium? That Atlanto-Mediterranean sounds like something Measurehead would say.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

I'd be willing to wager that the Venn diagram of Lemmy users and people who have played it is basically just a circle

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP B4 IS DONE GIVING ORDERS AROUND HERE. THE INFLUENCE OF THE "HAM SANDWICH RACE" IS WANING.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 weeks ago

"Ancap" 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

[–] [email protected] 27 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Wtf is wrong with this dude.

Obsessed with comparison.

E: if anyone reading this has intrusive thoughts of comparing yourself to others, stop that shit. Comparison to others is a killer of all joy, and nobody cares except you.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 weeks ago

He learned it from Daddy Trump.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

I thought inches didn't convert easily to decimal...?

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I love that he’s rounded it to two decimal places. As if a woman would say, “7.7? That’s it?”

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

yeah, there is no way the measurement instrument was precise enough to make that last decimal significant

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 weeks ago

He just wants to filter out all the women who understand sig figs because he can't handle dating someone smarter or more educated than him.

Also, if he was going to measure in fucking inches he should've just called it "3/4"

[–] towerful 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

He measured on a heartbeat to ensure it was as big as possible

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

during high tide

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

I love that he included his penis size at all. As if a woman would say, "Oh finally, a man who is letting me know the important details I really care about."

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

His second message after saying "Hi" is probably a dick pic.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

with the calipers to prove his measurement

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Digital calipers use decimal inches rather than fractional. I’m guessing that was what he used to measure himself.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 weeks ago

I'm thinking he used his eyes and threw out a number that he liked.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

After reading this, I want to convert his inches with my left foot

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

This is one place where the metric system really shines. If I say I'm 6.5", it sounds like I'm desperate for that last half inch. If I say I'm 17cm, that's just what it is.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Willing to settle for minarchist...

Based on the rest of this prick's ad, there's a nigh 100% chance he is a menarchist (ephebophile).

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