this post was submitted on 30 Apr 2024
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[–] [email protected] 119 points 6 months ago (43 children)

The bear is honest, either it eats you or it fucks off. The bear would never pretend to be friendly to gain your trust, or pretend to fuck off and instead stalk you for days. I can more accurately surmise a bears intentions than i can for any random man because all the bear could possibly want out of me is a meager amount of food.

Men getting angry about this are being upset by the possibility that they could potentially be considered threatening, by a completely uninformed third party nonetheless. And their chosen recourse is to demonstrate threatening behavior.

Some men are real snowflakes tbh

[–] [email protected] 84 points 6 months ago (12 children)

I'm a man and I endorse this message.

One thing about being a man is other men drop their guards around you and say the things they believe about their roles regarding women and masculinity. In my experience, most men are fine. Many are confused about who they are and their place in the world but do their best to be good people. Other men are just rotten, selfish, and/or broken people for many reasons. They're often victims of abuse who perpetuate that abuse.

Some, though, are also confused and do their best, but what their best looks like is informed by people like Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson. They believe women are somehow subhuman and that treating them as such is natural, right, and good. They believe in a social hierarchy and that might makes right. These are the men to worry about. The bad men I mentioned before generally know they're bad or are broken enough that one can notice. These guys, though, appear normal but will absolutely fuck you over to get what they believe they deserve, all the while patting themselves on the back for being such an upstanding person who is "just enforcing the natural order".

That's why I'd also choose the bear.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago

Ugh. I hate it when some misogynistic asshole assumes I agree with his views on women because I have the same downstairs anatomy as he does. Fuck you and stop "🙄 women..." around me. You'd be the first one to whine about a woman doing the same thing about men.

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[–] [email protected] 94 points 6 months ago (48 children)

This is terrible logic to go by.

If you generalise half the population and insult them then of course people are going to be mad at you.

This is like some boomer saying "All feminists are easily offended lesbians that just like to shout out people"

Then smugly being like "haha you proved my point" when a femininst rightly takes issue with that statement.

[–] [email protected] 79 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Also bears can't type, which introduces a massive bias during data collection.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 6 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 42 points 6 months ago (4 children)

This is also an indicator of the world’s best insult as per the comic Basic Instructions:

“I find you argumentative and easily offended.”

Basically no one is allowed to respond to it.

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[–] [email protected] 75 points 6 months ago (8 children)

Some men feel the need to prove their masculinity to this woman who’s obviously rage baiting, the rest of us are thanking the bear for taking one for the team.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 6 months ago

To be fair, usually women don't have to be rage baiting at all and still get the same toxic responses. We still have a loooong way to go for real equality. But we've also come a fair ways, so keep up the good work! ❤️

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[–] [email protected] 53 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Posts bait. Catches idiots. Stays relevant.

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[–] [email protected] 51 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I’d generally pick a bear too, most of the time you could just walk away. A human might try to talk to me or something.

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[–] [email protected] 47 points 6 months ago (38 children)

Maybe it's because i'm a man, but this trend saddens me. I don't often see what the other gender thinks of us, but the fact that a big part of us are a bother that all off us should be seen as more dangerous than a bear. Damn...

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago

Men in real life (in my experience) are mostly lovely folks. Men in places like Lemmy and Reddit can be pretty decent too, depending on the thread. But honestly, at what point has it been 'safe' to self identify as a woman on the wider Internet? Like to have a female voice in a game chat? Or in a random chat room? Between a lot of online harassment (which only needs a small slice of men participating in to be felt much more broadly) and the political and cultural attempts to strip women of power, I get this kind of outlook happening. It just really fucking sucks.

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 6 months ago

The people complaining that she is being derogatory to men are the same people who would say "what do you expect going into the woods alone with a strange man? What did you think would happen?"

[–] [email protected] 42 points 6 months ago (4 children)

What species of bear? Because that makes a lot of difference.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 6 months ago (4 children)

Somewhere between gummy and grizzly

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 39 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Imagine the stupid Pence Rule (never be alone with a woman who isn't your wife). And framing it as you'd rather be alone with a velociraptor than a strange woman because a velociraptor is less likely to falsely accuse you of something.

I get that the point of the joke is that women think men are dangerous, but any nuance or discussion is completely out the window due to how stupid and inflammatory the framing is

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)

I would also like to add, actually educating people about average bear behaviour would help.

Most bears will flee if given a choice, and are very unlikely to attack. Globally, there's only around 40 bear attacks a year, and less than 5% are deadly. A lot of how they react is driven by how the encounter starts, if you're within 60m before it notices you, you're significantly more likely to be attacked.

Meaning that seeing a bear from a distance off is basically always just going to be neat and maybe a nice photo.

They are huge dangerous creatures, but so are people, and they'd rather not take the risk.

Knowing that makes the argument a bit more reasonable than just pointing out how bad/unpredictable men are

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 6 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 33 points 6 months ago (22 children)

Just once I would like to open one of these threads and not see a bunch of lemmites embarrassing themselves by deliberately misinterpreting something.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 6 months ago (4 children)

If you don't fuck with the bear, the bear probably won't fuck with you. Just steer clear of it you'll be fine.

Humans on the other hand, could do anything.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 6 months ago (4 children)

I'm a strange man and I'd rather be with the bear too

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago

Thank you to the men in the comments who react like humans with empathy!

But god damn there are a lot of people on this thread that are taking this VERY personally.

  1. Nobody is denying that men in our society deserve to be respected, nobody is saying IF YOU'RE A MAN FUCK YOU ID RATHER BE MAULED, and nobody is saying that women are always right no matter what.

  2. Of course the man could be weaker/not a threat. Of course he should be assumed safe. Of course everyone should respect all genders. And, OF COURSE, some women lie about rape! Yes! You do in fact have valid concerns!

HOWEVER, It is really shitty some people commenting decide to take a clear example with obvious intentions and then make it about themselves, and then abuse women in the comments... you are proving the point, and in fact, you are a huge red flag already.

This question already sets the scene, you are alone in the woods: there is a strange man OR you are alone in the woods: there is a strange bear. The man's intentions (AND the bear's intentions) is not clear, we only know that he is there, and he is strange. No need to make up reasons why the guy is OK, minding his business, etc. Because in the situation given, the point of the question was to ask people how they would feel lost in the woods with a man or a bear, with such a small amount of information!

The question is trying to shed light on WHY the women asked said they prefer the bear. Do they think every man -at all- is a threat? Do they think that all men will overpower and harm them"because all men want to use their strength to rape/hurt women" because they are "biologically meant to*?* and, then, where do the fears come from and what can we do to change that? Why assume the worst when everything could be just fine?

I wish people would react more like "this is very depressing, and I understand why women are sometimes afraid of men in situations out of their control" or "I am doing my part to be a safe man ". But ask yourself, "do I know someone that would clearly make a woman feel unsafe to be around?" You might know more than one person like this, and they are why we talk about this in the first place.

The best way I've ever heard to describe this fear women live with is this: "when I approach a bees nest, it is highly unlikely they will attack me, they are usually docile!. That does not mean I won't try to avoid being stung. "

[–] [email protected] 30 points 6 months ago (7 children)

I mean, do I know if the bear is hungry? What type of bear? I'd take a well fed black bear over a random person, they ain't gonna fuck with you. Pretty much any other scenario and I ain't messing with the bear.

[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Water bear. Ravenously hungry.

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Ah just what we need, more gender warfare, rather than focusing on the 1% who increase inflation and make wars, and steal your paychecks.

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[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 months ago (9 children)

imo for pedants like myself, it needs to be made clear if the bear is LIKELY to harm you

If its a black bear, red panda, or the like that is not even fair, EVERYONE would rather be with a bear that doesnt want to be near you rather than some potentially dangerous rando

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

From what I've read, unless you're doing something like going between a mother and her cubs, if it's not a grizzly or polar bear, it's likely more scared of you than you are of it.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I am a pretty tall, broadly built man, so obv I'm a little biased because I'm reasonably confident that I could kill another man if it came to it. However, the concept of this question bothers me, because it doesn't indicate what kind of bear. Trust me, if you ever come face to face with a fully grown grizzly, you'd prefer the man. Monsters are real, and they can destroy you on accident, while men have weak necks and unprotected kidneys.

If I was dead either way though, obv I'd rather it be an emotionless grizzly who'd tear me apart pretty quickly.

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[–] [email protected] 23 points 6 months ago (7 children)

I just want to know how many bears she knows on a a personal level to make it possible for there to be a "strange bear".

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[–] [email protected] 21 points 6 months ago (15 children)

If I mer another man in the woods I would say hi and walk by. Bears are fucking dangerous. I really dont understand why all of you are so afraid of other people.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (11 children)

disclaimer - i haven't read the article/opinion. anyway, if someone said this to me, i think i would understand what is really being communicated, which is something like "i don't trust men i don't know, men i don't know feel very unsafe to me." i don't think i would get hung up taking the statement literally. my thinking would be something like, "why do men seem so unsafe to you?" (knowing the answer is likely based in experience or observation of some kind), rather than "what kind of bear?"

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Pretty much all points from all parties in this thread just reinforce my ever growing refusal to leave the house or interact with anybody unless absolutely necessary.

Eventually, I'll probably be the strange man in the woods because that's as far away from people as I can get. Should we meet at that time, then by all means, I encourage you, regardless of gender, to move along and go get you some bear love.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

I can guarantee that she would have received zero emails from bears.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

As a man, I'd never be stuck in a forest with Kate.

Forests are scary. Can't we go to a zoo?

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

Ms Lister,

Rrrrawrrr RRRRaAArrR roaaAARR ROOAr roarr ROAAar rrrRooaarr rroAARR ROoaar.

RRRAR, Bear

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago

I wanna see the strange bear, and I don't wanna see a strange man, so the choice is fairly easy

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (4 children)

is it a black bear or a grizzly bear? very important question. A similar logic applies to men except the criterion is probably much harder to gauge by eye.

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