this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 152 points 7 months ago (20 children)

I will never understand obtuse alternate spellings that are just homophones. Like Trinity spelled Triniteigh accomplishes nothing.

[–] [email protected] 119 points 7 months ago (7 children)
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[–] [email protected] 74 points 7 months ago (1 children)

You're just sentencing your child to forever have to spell out their name to strangers

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Trying to be Irish without setting foot in the old country for 5 generations

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago (7 children)

I worked under someone at an old job who named his son Jaxon. And kept pictures Jaxon drew and signed on the wall of his office. So every time I needed something from him, I would have to see Jaxon's name in his office. And I hated it.

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[–] [email protected] 114 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Fuck you Wolfgang Atreides is money. I'd follow that baby into battle.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Also, Leviathan? 100%. And my only problem with Dusti Rose is the "I".

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Dusti Rose sounds like a matricidal professional wrestler.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago

Definitely a stripper name.

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[–] [email protected] 69 points 7 months ago (12 children)

I'm all for unique and clear identifiers for everything, including people, but jesus christ, imagine yourself in elementary school having a weird name. Why would parents choose a hard mode for their progeny?

[–] [email protected] 64 points 7 months ago (3 children)

I'm a big proponent of normal/semi obscure normal first name, weird middle name. John W Smith if you work in sales, J Wolfgang Smith if you're an author. Perfect compromise.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (18 children)

We gave our daughter a somewhat disused but normal and formerly not uncommon name which was the name of a plant. We just wanted a name that wasn't religious but still normal enough that she wouldn't get bullied for it (she got bullied anyway). We realized later that it actually made sense in terms of her ancestry because her mother has a plant name, her grandmother has a plant name and her great-grandmother had a plant name. One long lineage of plant names.

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[–] [email protected] 56 points 7 months ago (5 children)

Ok but Sigurd Felix Wolfgang Atreides goes pretty hard.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 7 months ago

Well, it TRIES pretty hard 😜

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[–] AdmiralShat 53 points 7 months ago (5 children)

I heard so much racism/making fun about black names growing up, but like, white people names are some of the absolute goofiest shit I've ever heard.

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[–] [email protected] 52 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I'm not one to judge parents baby names, but Merricka??

[–] [email protected] 40 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 51 points 7 months ago (5 children)

Triniteigh

This one makes Jesus cry.

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[–] [email protected] 45 points 7 months ago (4 children)

i'm so fucking happy sweden has laws preventing this stuff, names here have to be approved as not causing undue harm to the child

[–] [email protected] 48 points 7 months ago (5 children)

I could see a system like that being used to racist ends in America. “Please select from the pre-approved list of biblical names”

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[–] [email protected] 44 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Personally, I prefer names that are forbidden, like Username, Null, Admin, 'SELECT * FROM Users;-- , [email protected], Error, ,

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[–] [email protected] 43 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (4 children)

Do these parents not realise that they are naming real humans that will also be adults one day? Like, just imagine a grown-ass woman named "Brexleigh".

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)

If I was a primary school kid with a classmate named brexliegh you can bet your ass I'd be calling them brexit

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 7 months ago (1 children)

It's a child not a vanity plate

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[–] [email protected] 42 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Some of these names sound like those brands you only ever find on Amazon

[–] [email protected] 43 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Amazon barely even does brand names now.

A baby name from Amazon would be like "BABY CHILD YOUTH LIL ADULT 6LB 7LB 8LB DOCTOR OLYMPICS ATHLETE FAMOUS TALL INDOOR OUTDOOR EASY TO CLEAN CUTE COLLECTIBLE FAMILY 3-PACK"

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (6 children)

What irks me the most is the effort these idiot parents will go to give their baby as basic a name as "Allison" or "Ashley"

  • Ashlie
  • Ashlee
  • Ashly
  • Ashleigh
  • Ashlea
  • Ashli
  • Ashely
  • Ashlei
  • Ashleah
  • Asheleigh
  • Ashelie
  • Ahshlee
  • the list goes on and on and on

No amount of vowels is going to make your kid's name stand out when at the end of the day it's the same pronunciation as the most common, basic form of it.

Mötley might be weird but it's at least unique.

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (4 children)

Sigurd. Felix. Wolfgang. Atreides. No one can mess with that mf.

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[–] [email protected] 37 points 7 months ago (1 children)

There was a missing child report near me whose name was Mill'ionaire.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I have a half-baked outline for a character who goes by C. M. Mil’naire and is really embarrassed about the fact that his full name is actually Cash Money Mil’naire. I have no idea how to use him, but I love him too much to not keep around.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (7 children)

I've always felt like the names we pick for ourselves ought to be more valid than the ones others choose for us. We should choose names for ourselves at different stages of life, and just tack them on in whatever order we like. You want something more fun than mummy and daddy gave you? Knock yourself out. Were your idiot parents drunk when they signed the papers? Well you can fix that at 12 if you like. We are who we choose to be and this the goddamn future.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 7 months ago

Well some of these will not require your daughter to think of her stripper name.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 7 months ago (7 children)

My daughter has a friend named Hayley. She is not amused when I spell it heighleigh

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 7 months ago (11 children)

You’re gonna look me in the eyes and tell me Raddix isn’t straight fire?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (4 children)

Raddix Zephyr is def the name of the protagonist in a JRPG.

Sigurd Felix Wolfgang Atreides is for sure the Prince in an Isekai anime.

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[–] [email protected] 30 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (5 children)

If I had been named Triniteigh I would have legally changed my name as soon as I was old enough. That's an atrocity of a name. Some are so funny they circle back around to something that would at least be interesting to have as a name (Raddix Zephyr is dumb but in more of a fun way, and I would genuinely not mind being named Leviathan), but Triniteigh is just so, so bad.

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago

People really took "video game name genrator" to the real world.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago (3 children)

Dusti Rose sounds like a 40 year old chain smoker that looks 65

Why would you name your kid that

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago (8 children)

Leviathan is awesome. I'd trade that for my common but bad name.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 7 months ago

Many people dislike their own names, but I think SomeGuy69 is an awesome name, too. Cheer up!

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 7 months ago (1 children)

To be fair, Leviathan is a banger middle name. Plus you can be called Levi for short :)

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[–] [email protected] 28 points 7 months ago

Agreed. Mötley can stay.

As someone whose name is an odd spelling that is close to something more conventional, life can be taxing. I'm not saying that there isn't room for creativity or fun/romantic name choices here. But Triniteigh's Parents are setting their kid up for a lifetime of bullying and inconvenience, followed by the shock of their kid going to the courthouse at 30 to undo things.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Madden Raige.

Lmao. Accidentally named your kid into a contract with Khorne.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Coyote Bao just sounds like a health code violation lmao

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago (4 children)

Whenever I read Mötley Crüe I have to think of this:

When we finally went to Germany, the crowds were chanting, “Mutley Cruh! Mutley Cruh! “ We couldn’t figure out why the fuck they were doing that.

Source

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I give it about a 98,5% chance, that the ones wanting to name their kid "Mötley", have no clue how "ö" is actually pronounced.

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Sigurd Atreides sounds cool enough but they went and jazzed it up.

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