this post was submitted on 05 May 2024
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Showerthoughts
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The problem is not that people are typing on phones... It's that all of the apps are now driven by profit-maximizing algorithms instead of algorithms that try to find your best match. OkCupid used to be the best dating site hands down because of the match percentage from the questions, but now it's just Different Tinder. You can still have great heartfelt conversations on mobile dating apps, it's just harder now.
I logged into OKC after not being on there for years.
What the actual fuck? It doesn't even make sense now
OkC is how I found my girlfriend because it let me know a lot of important info (demi/ace, no kids, looking for long term, match %) before I even tried matching with them. I got to be picky.
From what I hear, they got rid of every useful feature and turned it to shit.
Yeah it's pretty disappointing. Their analytics blog used to be awesome too, tons of cool insights and it was obvious that they knew what they were doing. I assume the entire operation got bought up by VC money in the gold rush of Tinder clones.
While you're right and my post addressed the same failure / bullshit, writing a long message as an opener would be seen as strange today. It's not the typical format and would trigger a red-flag for a lot of people. I'm talking six paragraphs, which was how I used to open comms before smartphone apps.
That just makes it a more effective filter for what you're looking for. Many people on the apps aren't interested in a long text conversation and would rather get to know each other in person. If you prefer conversing online for a while, then count it as a win if someone ignores or unmatches you for sending them a long message.
OkC seems to think I'm an absolute Adonis by Indian Ocean trade corridor standards, got hit up by folks from Uganda to Iran to India to Cambodia to Indonesia.
Thing kept insisting on showing my profile in those regions apparently despite me pretty consistently searching exclusively in the Northeast of the US.