this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 months ago (1 children)

i dont even understand the vaporeon thing, it literally is not even vaguely girl-shaped. it is a fish fox.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (6 children)

Because:

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago

hst-gun garcia-aim frog-no-pretext xi-gun

THIS IS THE HEXBEAR VPD PUT DOWN YOUR KEYBOARD OR WE OPEN FIRE

malcolm-checks the-gunman lea-finger-guns skeleton-guns-akimbo

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

Why did I make myself read that again?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago

Lmao I can’t believe this hasn’t been removed yet

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Volcel police ! Volcel people's vanguard !

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.

نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.

volcel-police