this post was submitted on 25 Jan 2025
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I vote for "Ivanktober" because that's the creepiest of their familial relationships I can think of off hand. It'll really augment the spooky vibe of the season.
Spooky season has been canceled due to being witchcraft and satan worship. You will instead be assigned a pew at your local evangelical church for reeducation.
What priests do to kids is way scarier than Halloween anyway.
Don't you know? Those priests were seduced by those children! It's the devil in them, making goodly and god-fearing men do these unthinkable acts! Really, we should be punishing the kids.
/sarcasm, for the people in the audience who will inevitably be too dense to get it