this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2024
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Two times this week I got the dreaded 'you seem like a great guy' from online dating apps.
The first had bad experiences in the past with guys who have the same first name as me.
The second we were going to meet up tomorrow for the first time but messaged today to say they've reconnected with a guy from their past so cya.
I understand the reasons but boy, with the lady who 'isn't one for pushing drugs on people, but I think you should take some of my medication', and one who said she just left a cult, online dating apps have not been fun (though, interesting).
Words can't express how much I appreciate missing the whole online dating thing. I met my wife at a very unromantic bar. In the days when "we met online" was still a bit weird.
Everything about the dating apps sounds awful. Not just for men, if anything I think women probably have it worse.
From the stories I hear, women definitely have it worse.
Yeah online dating sucks. There are plenty of, sorry to say it, fruit loops, on there. If I had just left a cult, I hope I'd go straight to a therapist!
I'm taking a long break from it and not sure if I ever want to try again. It seems like the only way in this day and age, although I did meet my ex at a bar.
Every time I try OLD, I try to get something out of it, even if it's not a partner. Last person I spoke to from there shared some great music (and I gave him some recs). Before that, met some people that it didn't work out with, but now they're in happy relationships - it has been nice to see :)
I recently went to the birthday party of an acquaintance, and she had friends there that she met from OLD apps.
It does seem like it's the only way. Doubly for me because I don't socialise or do anything in social circles.
I'll take a break from it and focus on other things.
what happened with the Melbourne girl? I might've missed that.
She bought a house in Melbourne so I think that kind of put a bit of a barricade in things. We still talk but it's more as friends.
Sorry to hear it man. I gave up online a long time ago and stick to in person.
More to lose, but it's so much better.
It's life. I'm probably gonna take a break from it and focus on uni and writing (and work I suppose)
Try not to let it stop you. I guess my mantra is "never give up", but sometimes a break does help.
How do you find people to date in person?
Go out on the weekends to bars pretty much. Or under very unique and rare circumstances, in your day to day life.
You need to be the kind of person who can smile and say "hey, no worries, have a great day/night" to being rejected. It hurts a bit in the beginning but then it's ok.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.