Ask Lemmy

Working from home full time.

I got engaged early last year, planned our wedding toward the end of the year. In between, I got a new job with salary more than twice of my previous job.

Now I am happily married, and after a raise my current salary is almost triple my previous job. I'm still trying to convince my former colleagues (just the cool ones) to also find new jobs.

Meeting my current wife through some mutual friends. Changed my life for the better. Can't imagine life without her in it anymore.

She makes me want to be a better person.

That's a long list but here's a few things.

• Going to therapy.
• Being willing to forgive and make peace with my dad.
• Seeking medical treatment for my ADHD.
• Getting a septoplasty. (Who knew being able to breathe through you nose was so great.)
• Divorcing my first wife, who is a truly awful person.
• Saying yes to a date with my (now) wife, who is an awesome person.
• Learning to love myself just the way I am.
• Taking an active role in managing my finances.

Nothing.

Life has been on a slow, downward slide since I was a teenager.

0. Going to collage and experiencing the wide gamut of experiences there.
1. Meeting my wife and her saying yes to going on a date with me my last year of college.
2. Living in a foreign country (Japan) for 3 years for work with my wife and having 2 kids while I was there.
3. Having kids (3 in total)
4. Designing and building our own house.

We moved from a 16m2 room to a 55m2 appartment.

It's still way smaller and actually too small for us to keep our hobby income going, compared to our old 120m house that had a lower rent.

But hey, it's something i guess.

Using the trade skills I acquired to pay for a computer science degree, which has secured me the best job I've ever had. Going to college later in life was absolutely a game changer.

Getting to fall in love with my wife

Got lucky as an early investor in crypto which has allowed me to feel more secure in taking on debt to purchase a home

Meeting my fiance by miles. It isn't even a contest.

A distant second, which is still miles above anything else below it on the list, is buying a good house in a cheap (bad) neighborhood at 3.1% interest 30 yr fixed.

Moving out of the province... Yeah, I fcking hate living in the big city but the people I've met and the friends I've made more than make up for it.

I started kayaking! It's been a lot of fun and it's been great to explore new places in my area that I've lived at for over 30 years!

I decided to start taking my health seriously this year.

Meeting my kid's mother

I love this question, super interesting to think about. I feel very lucky that it's hard for me to pick one, between meeting my fiancée (she makes my life better in every way), getting on adhd meds (a lot more things about life make sense now), or getting my job (since it's made me grow into a completely different, more capable person). Sometimes it's easy to get caught up in the negative thoughts, so thank you.

If you don't mind sharing, what about moving out has helped you? I'm sure there's as many different ways as there are people who would answer similarly, increased independence, escaping the power imbalance, having to grow as an adult, and so on

Being the son of the city major in a kind of big and well known Mexico city.