this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2023
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Just like 2 more week, are yall almost done yet?

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[–] [email protected] 115 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Um. Next year isn't 2025, son. Step away from the pipe.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

The meme scientist was so concerned whether or not they COULD post a meme

They forgot to stop and ask if they should post this one

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yes it is. Have you been sleeping for a year? We all thought you were just pretending, but you lay in that bed snoring the whole of 2024.

Wake up, otter! Stop d0zing through entire years! 2025 starts tomorrow! Don't trust your phone, NTP glitched while you were asleep and it's also wrong!!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Dude. Ketamine is not your friend.

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[–] [email protected] 98 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Wouldn't that actually double the amount of homeless people?

[–] [email protected] 37 points 10 months ago (1 children)

They're not friggin planarians

[–] [email protected] 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)

At first, I thought you meant planetars (from D&D), and I didn't know about that piece of trivia and felt inferior as a nerd.

But no, you really meant planarians (from reality), which is a science word and I now feel inferior because I am a moron.

Planarians are flatworms (phylum Platyhelminthes) found in freshwater bodies and their regenerative abilities have been documented for centuries (Pallas, 1766; Dalyell, 1814). Planarians can regenerate new heads, tails, sides, or entire organisms from small body fragments in a process taking days to weeks.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Friend, you're not a moron just cause you didn't know about some relatively unknown aquatic creature. You just got out-nerded this time 😎

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago (3 children)

The really weird part is that I actually did know.

What I don’t know is when, where, or how I got that information.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Are you the alt domain for the person I was talking to or someone random injecting themself in the conversation? Either way I'm happy you acquired knowledge at some point in the past

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 10 months ago

Only for a very short time

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[–] [email protected] 77 points 10 months ago (3 children)

2025

...

Just like 2 more week

2024: Am I a joke to you?

[–] [email protected] 51 points 10 months ago (1 children)

UK is in a different time zone

[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago

Oh right, my bad

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Ask September 3rd-13th, 1752.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

I would ask, but I can't find them. Where'd they go?!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

Imperial months

[–] [email protected] 53 points 10 months ago

That's a good idea, actually. That way, they could sleep on these benches with the armrest in the middle.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 10 months ago (5 children)

Maybe it's because I'm not a native english speaker but I read this as a pledge to murder all homeless people by cutting them in half 🤔

[–] [email protected] 21 points 10 months ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago (2 children)

While this particular ad is fake, it's entirely on brand for the party featured on it to state that they want to do that.

They recently stated they believed being homeless is a lifestyle choice.

Source: Am political journalist in UK.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Maybe it's because I am a native english speaker but I read this as a pledge to murder all homeless people by cutting them in half 🤔

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Maybe it's because I'm a homeless person but I read this as a pledge to murder all English speakers by cutting them in half 🤔

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

The conservatives make pledges to solve social issues, like homelessness, all the time. They almost never actually follow through. Instead they often act to make the problem "go away", often to the detriment of those they claimed to want to help.

One of those pledges was to cut homelessness in half. However no extra money or resources were actually provided to do this. This sign is a protest of that (and many other) lies. At a glance, it's one of their normal lies. It's only when you read it more carefully your brain goes "wait, what?!?".

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Have you tried "kill the poor"?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I'm not saying do it, I'm saying run it through the computer and see whether it would work.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago (2 children)

But, once we kill the 'poor poor', wont the regular poor be next? and then 'the not so but mostly poor' after that?

where does the poor stop!?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

There's always a bottom 10%. We'll run our society like General Electric - up or out.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Tbf, cutting people in half typically doesn't support them staying alive

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 10 months ago

Nearly done. Just waiting on a chainsaw from Amazon.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Seems a little extreme to me. Surely, there most be more humane solutions.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

There isn't, and don't call me Shirley.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 14 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Finally a realistic solution to end homelessness /s

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago

Hey, if it worked for King Solomon...

[–] [email protected] 13 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That's very ambiguous wording. Are they going to have cut all existing homeless people in half by that date, or legislate homeless people must be cut in half by that date?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 10 months ago

it’s going messily, op

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (4 children)

That is a wildly morbid slogan.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Why cut them in half when we could continue to let them suffer for decades and accept none of the blame or consequences?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Well, as usual they offloaded the work on the cheapest contractor, which happens to be homeless people, and they have been dragging their feet. Not the conservative's fault really, that's the innate laziness of the working class.

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

They first have to quit the international human rights agreements before they are allowed to cut people in Halves. Give them a break!

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

Turns out homeless people drink much more milk than expected, or are somehow getting their hands on calcium supplements, their bones are far less brittle than expected and keep dulling out the blades.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

It's been a while since I've been scrolling Lemmy and literally had to stop due to bursting out laughing.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 10 months ago

I wasn't gonna pay this month's rent but fuck that. I just had to apply at the cheap porn studio for fluffer and the rest is history. Cuz I don't want the government to cut me in half. Sure it feels like being cut in half sometimes but it pays the bills.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago

Well, if there are twice as many homeless then, it's a proven success isn't it?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

They're about halfway there

[–] [email protected] 9 points 10 months ago (2 children)

"Whoa, livin' on a prayer."

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