this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] [email protected] 120 points 1 year ago (8 children)

People really use this awful font as their default??

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 year ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Watching that skit never ceases to get a genuine laugh out of me. I'm literally gonna go watch it right now lol

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

I know what you did...

I KNOW WHAT YOU DIIIDDDDDD!!!!

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

Wingdings is where it's at

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

At least comic sans is legible

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

There's a comic I follow on IG (candy hearts I fhink) that uses papyrus to troll people. Lol

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 year ago

Sheryl does.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

I think it matches the content in this case 😅

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Kevin is the man my cunt cheryl has been having an affair with

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (6 children)

It makes it easier to read if you have something like dyslexia

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If someone ever tried to show me something on their phone and they have some weird font I just run. What they're showing is likely going to scar me emotionally and is likely very crazy

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Much as I don't like to judge people on fonts, this one reeks of psychopath.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I think some old phones defaulted to it

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Phones from ancient Egypt.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Just like aunt Sheryl.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Bring back comic sans!!

I've started sneaking it into change controls with whatever snarky tone I can muster...

[–] [email protected] 93 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Halfway through the web of social connections, I was expecting this to end like that old doctor riddle or some sort of logic puzzle where you have to identify people from a set of linked clues.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago

This really does read like a high school word problem.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago

My brain just melted out of my ears

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I really have to play more chess

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I joined chess club in school and I lost in 3 moves at the first tournament. I learned at a young age that chess is not my game.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Did they take a bag of popcorn to thanksgiving? Because, I’m getting ‘they took a bag of popcorn to their mom’s thanksgiving diner’ vibes here.

Any follow up?

[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Found this on Bing

Kevin came later than Aunt Sheryl and her husband. I am sitting, waiting patiently. As Kevin walks into the room, Aunt Sheryl looks horrified and goes completely silent. Her husband asks if everything is okay and greets Kevin courteously. Throughout dinner, my aunt acts super suspicious and Kevin acts uneasy too. Her husband, bless his stupid soul, doesn't see any of this and starts actually bonding (the stupid man!). Soon after we finish dinner, we all decide to drink some beers and watch the game. Aunt Sheryl complains of a headache and retreats to the guest bedroom. Kevin also wants to leave but Aunt Sheryl's husband goads him into staying for a bit longer. Kevin reluctantly agrees.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I thought u/shittymorph came with us for a second.

I'm probably just yelling into the void but...

Hey @shittymorph did you make it?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's a potential imposter here somewhere. I thought the real shittymorph retired shortly before hell broke loose on the site-that-must-not-be-named

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Back on the site-that-must-not-be-named, u/shittymorph would wander subreddits randomly and drop a comment that seemed relevant, but devolved into a diatribe about a 1998(?) pro wrestling match in which The Undertaker threw Mankind off the top of Hell in a cell, 16 feet into an announcers table.

Damn, I feel like I just channeled him to write that comment.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago

The husband trusts his wife and doesn't make a big deal about some awkwardness and tries to be inviting to a new-comer. Instead of always accusing his wife of having an affair everytime they meet a new man. It's a lose-lose for this fellow

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Unfortunately none. Absconded with this several years back and don't even remember where.

To be a fly on that wall.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Damn shame, because that’s some good popcorn material.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

No fly could stick to that wall because it doesn't exist

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

There's so much to unpack here.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A and B and C and D are going to a destination E.

A and B are having an affair. C is being cheated on. D is planning on enjoying the act of torturing A B and C

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I knew those unions and sets would come in handy one day.

I might be able to come up on with a less direct way of telling the story than the original post, but it would take effort.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Hmmm according to set theory it sounds like uncle is gonna fuck Kevin but idk I never learned set theory

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Damn, poor Kevin. It doesn't sound like he deserves this 🙁

Fuck Aunt Sheryl... But I wish Kevin could have been spared.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

I'm sure Kevin will bounce back. It's a new relationship. Not like it's been going on for years. Hopefully the uncle doesn't beat him up.

[–] BravoVictor 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Dear internet: please be a true story.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

That reads to me as if it could have blown up at anytime anyway. I think her doing only accelerated the inevitable.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Wouldn't Aunt Sheryl happen to have ruined the poster's relationship by marrying her husband?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

i could feel my braincells commit suicide as i read this

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