Add Wolverine/Deadpool healing factor.
this post was submitted on 04 Apr 2025
47 points (94.3% liked)
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Make everyone shit rounded rare earth metal cylinders. Suddenly we don't need Cobalt and Lithium mines any more and the worst aspects of having to poop are solved too. It's dry and doesn't stink, so no need for the toilet, just poop in your little collection bucket, no need for wiping and then you go on with your day.
Squeezing a metal cylinder out my chute sounds a lot less pleasant than just pooping poop.
Haha fair enough, I was thinking of multiple little ones not singular big ones. Think of bunny droppings or something.
Remove sneezing. If only because I find people wishing me "bless you" to be the most useless & meaningless human interaction I can think of.
How about your bless my farts, Ryan, you purposeless dingbat.
Hear everyone's thoughts at will so I can hear anyone's thoughts if I want to.
Biting my cheeks or tongue while eating
Oof, I can totally relate 👍
There’s only one good answer to this question period.
Everyone's saying the need to sleep. That goes a bit too far IMO. Who knows it would work out as we think it to be? Maybe the 33% we sleep will just be reduced off our lifespan with nothing won.
Also, honestly, even if that wouldn't be the case - I wouldn't want to not sleep at all. It's like a regular break from life. Even if employers wouldn't exploit this, I don't want to be awake forever.
Now, here's my proposal: We still need to sleep, but we can control falling asleep and waking up like it's a muscle. Lay in bed and fall asleep anytime. No more falling-asleep issues for anyone, no more sleepless nights.
And also, we'd have a perfect inner clock and the ability to choose when we wake up. Fall asleep at 11 PM, have to get up at 7? Great, you know exactly when 8hrs are over and are able to just wake up, no alarm needed.
That thing when you accidentally swallow the smallest amount of spit the wrong way and start coughing like mad
Back pain is not painful anymore, but rather pleasant now
Surprised nobody said cell degradation.
You now can live for as long as you're not killed whilst physically keeping an appearance of an ~30 y.o. This also technically prevents cancer.
The "loosing hair where I want it to grow and growing it where I definitely don't want it to grow" thing.
needing food. that would free up a lot of time and money, no input = no output. no dishes, no stove or fridge, no need for a dishwasher, then on the other end, no need for TP, or even a toilet!
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I would like to correct the gut-brain connection. 95% of the time our gut tells our brain that it wants something, and it's trying to say it wants water, but the brain hears that the gut is hungry.
My gut just wants beer right now.
Have an upvote 👍
I would eliminate the ability for humans to reproduce.
Have you SEEN people?
As long as we can still practice.
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Remove the need to exercise, like an anaconda. The ability to just lay around doing nothing and still be ripped to the max. That would be cool!
˙˙˙ǝɹǝɥ uᴉ ƃuᴉɯᴉɥɔ ɐɔᴉɹǝɯ∀ ɥʇnoS
I wanted to say allergies, but I am not sure you mean abnormal stuff too.
Breathing otherwise. Annoying + can't stay underwater for long enough.
Though if add, direct thought + feeling sharing. Current communication is way too inefficient.
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Shitting feels good... I would just alter it so it doesn't smell bad, tastes like brownie batter, and isn't toxic.
Excuse me, I just farted. What the fuck did I just read? 😂🤣
Our dog is named Brownie, I'm not in any hurry to taste his batter.
Anyways, free upvotes for everyone today 👍
Toenail growth.
Cutting nails is annoying, and toenails are awkward and stupid.
Remove need to sleep. You would get ~33% more time every day.
I can't wait to work 24 hours a day! No pesky sleep getting in the way anymore.
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We’d just be exploited for our labor 33% more.
I’m pretty sure everyone can agree that it’s unpleasant.
I strongly disagree.
Personally I'd remove the need for sleep and effectively increase my lifespan by 3rd.
I'd like to urinate from my thumbs at will.
Who is Will, and what did he do?
😂🤣
Eliminate the need to sleep.
As others have mentioned:
Welcome to 24 hour work days...
Have an upvote regardless 👍
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Sneezing/snot production. Sure, it can feel amazing. But the sudden urgency to stop everything I'm doing and focus on my nose or risk a disgusting eruption of green mucus all over my face in a public setting is something I could do without.
Also, I'm waiting for someone with medical knowledge to come in here and mention Prions or something else silently devastating to the body.
Sleep.
Welcome to 22 hour work shifts, with twenty minute breaks.
Twenty minute whats?
Am salaried and also had the exact same thought. I haven’t had a work break in … 10 years at least. My fault, yeah.
Haha. Not what I meant but I guess it works too.
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Sweating. I wanna be exclusively water cooled. None of this evaporative cooling BS. Just swap fluid every six months to a year. I always need moving air anyways…
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