this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2025
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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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My entire mental health sob story, avatar is from art I made, I'm emberinmoss.bsky.social (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 2 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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If mental health matters, then the mental healthcare system needs to practice what they preach instead of just say things to look good for their psas. There's so many homeless people in my town and I easily see myself becoming one at this rate. Do what you can to take care of yourself. Try to avoid shitty drs and therapists. It's not always easy.

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

You need to be drinking water. That's the scariest part of this for me. I realise this probably plays into the delusions, so if it helps you can look at my comment history. I've made reference to it a few times already: I live in New Zealand, and I've never even been to the states. Please figure the water thing out. Being dehydrated will not be making anything easier, and it's the simplest problem to solve. Would you feel better drinking filtered water?

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

If tap water freaks OP out, they could maybe try one of those basic water filter pitchers. Pour water in, it runs through charcoal which pulls out anything bad, clean water comes out.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I normally wouldn't recommend fiddling about with your own water filtering solutions, because given clean water they'll only be making it dirty. But if your worry is literal poison in the water supply, carbon filters will pull that shit out. It won't fix the paranoid delusions though.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Dehydration has been shown to exacerbate the symptoms of mental illness, so it certainly won't make them worse!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

For extra peace of mind, OP can consider getting a TDS ("Total Dissolved Solids") meter. My boyfriend got one and uses it to figure out when we need to change water filters.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I got so thirsty I just gave in and drank it. And when I didn't die, I decided, screw it. The water paranoia is not always present, but if it is around for too long, what I have done is boiled the water and drank it hot. I think a water filter could be a good investment for this. Thank you for the suggestion. And I'm sorry this was such a heavy post. Thank you for your response. Yes, it's been a wild ride on the crazy train. I don't recommend this ride, I give the crazy train one star review.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

I've been there. Not really with the water thing, but I thought I was being watched, and that my GF was working for the CIA, my workplace was a front, and everyone working there was faking it, for the purposes of monitoring me, etc. That shit is scary! I was aware on some level that I wasn't being rational, but man, your own brain can be sooo convincing. I had that stupid fucking Nirvana line running through my head the whole time "just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you." It's never really gone away, but I've found ways of managing it for myself, but live in constant fear if it getting bad again. So when I say this, you can trust it: I really do understand, and I sincerely hope you figure it out. All the best mate

[–] [email protected] 27 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Anon needs to hunt down their old psychiatrist and find a way to move closer to them.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

This sounds like that movie What About Bob.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Group therapy has been shown to be as effective as one-on-one therapy for a lot of people. It’s worth it to try just a couple times.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Thank you. Yes, I haven't completely given up hope. I know this post was extremely heavy and uh, I was having a moment. I have schizoaffective disorder that runs in the family and it's been kicking my ass recently. Which is also why it took me a whole week to even look at the other responses. I think I might post on Lemmy what I've learned about this mental disorder. Even though it's been hell to endure, having knowledge about the enemy in my head has given back to me some power. There are a few good neuroscience videos on the how and why of psychotic spectrum disorders like schizophrenia and schizoaffective.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

I’m glad to hear you’re moving forward with better understanding of how your brain functions and (hopefully) how to address some of the challenges that can present.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Theres a hole from here to hell.

Fall deep, and find no peace.

In the sea of tragic beasts.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

The gates of hell are open night and day, smooth is the descent and easy is the way.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm saving it.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

It's from the Aeneid:

The gates of hell are open night and day;
Smooth the descent, and easy is the way:
But to return, and view the cheerful skies,
In this the task and mighty labor lies.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

The only home sure to accept any and all as they come;

With open arms and barbed claws, inviting you in before becoming fearsome.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Everything has a double meaning now but can't deny I love a good poem. Thank you.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Takes it easy man. Drinking and eating correctly can give you energies and make you feel better, exercises and outdoor activity also help

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

I'm sorry this got so heavy. It's been a lot this month. Stupid brain not working. Yes, absolutely. A vegetable and a walk can help, there's no denying that. It won't cure it, the disorder I have called schizoaffective disorder, but it's still better than nothing. I got some red peppers and a glass of water. All set.

[–] gaspar_petersen 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah OP I dont think that peer support group helped

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Sure it did. Kidding.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I guess you can't go to your family for legit reasons, but what about family friends?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I posted this and then ran away (or rather, rolled over and played dead possum), but I'm back and not dead yay. I actually had not even thought about this. Thank you. I know one family friend of my mom's. They're someone I could maybe talk to, it's just that I'm so severely anxious to approach anyone. I will try.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago

Good luck on your journey stranger