this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2025
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At the end of the day, Canada is many things. But above all else, we’re a bunch of grudge holding motherfuckers. You’ve taken your shot at us, so now we won’t rest until we get you back.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 hours ago

Only disagreement from me (in California, USA) is that I wouldn't diminish the actions of our neighbors to the north by calling them "petty" in this instance. Nothing petty about standing up to a bully in whatever capacity you can. 🫡

[–] ICastFist 1 points 1 hour ago

So, Canadians are RL Warhammer Fantasy dorfs.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago

Don’t mess with nice guys.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 18 hours ago (4 children)

Did americans forget about the time we burned down their Whitehouse?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 hours ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

It's actually by Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie (also Canadian). I don't really know how it got attributed to The Arrogant Worms, but it was probably Napster's fault.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 hours ago

Fixt. Yeah, never shows as anything but Arrogant Worms. I'll stop misattributing it. Thanks for the heads up buddy 👍

[–] [email protected] 4 points 12 hours ago (2 children)

They have since upgraded the Whitehouse with fire-resistant materials, premise security, and anti-missile systems.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Wonder if the anti missile systems still work if we shut off NORAD first?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 hours ago

I mean, wait a few more weeks...Trump, Musk and D.O.G.E will probably "efficiency" NORAD out of functionality, if not out of existence entirely.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

It's such a shame Canada never saw the need to advance their military technology beyond muskets and smoothbores or they'd be able to do something anyways.

Actually, a bunch of smoothbore cannons would still work, I think.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 hours ago

Currently we rank 28th of 145 in terms of military strength.

There's some reporting that may or may not be reliable (hence not linked,) saying that there's plans in place to fight against American invasion. Everything I've seen, and the little I've discussed with my friends in the Canadian forces, seems to suggest a quick response to buy time for the majority of our forces to arm and equip themselves, then to fight a guerrilla war. We're under staffed, underfunded (relatively speaking,) but highly trained, and extremely motivated. That's not taking into account the fact that there's a largeish portion of the population who are registered gun owners (roughly 25% national population,) the majority of those being long rifles. A history of an avid hunting culture across the whole country, means likely formation of militia groups doing ambush sniping, and lots of strikes on logistics and infrastructure.
We also have a lot of new citizens and PRs who were active in the Bosnian conflict, fighting for both sides. All this would make invading Canada initially easy, and then a long slow bleed.

But wtf do I know, I've never served, and I'm just a Stone Mason. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.....

[–] jeff 19 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (1 children)

As an American that lived in Canada for a few years.

Yes. I mean, first of all it was over 200 years ago. And Americans aren't generally great with history. Second, we don't really think about it as Canadians. I was at least taught it was British troops, which is accurate, but I never really made the connection that it was really Canadians until I lived in Canada and a Canadian made the claim.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 13 hours ago

Technically it was British troops. The people who burned down the White House sailed from Bermuda and never entered Canada. However, the bulk of the fighting during that war was done by Canadians, and it was Canadians that drove back the American invasion.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 13 hours ago

Canadians sure haven't!

And the fact that it was actually British regulars...

[–] [email protected] 68 points 20 hours ago

Think of us like John Wick (starring Keanu Reeves, one of many great Canadian performers we’ve been kind enough to send your way you ungrateful fucks). We didn’t want a fight. But you killed our dog.

This made my day and made the point perfectly.

[–] [email protected] 57 points 20 hours ago (3 children)

The only thing missing from this article is highlighting how we're (with Poland's help) responsible for the geneva conventions existing.

Canada is all nice, polite and sweet.

... until we're not.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 hours ago

Geneva ~~Conventions~~ Checklist

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Canada is all nice and polite and sweet, unless you’re First Nations native, in which case get the fuck in this residential school and learn to be a Christian you savage!

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 hours ago

Kill the Savage, save the Man.

Absolutely disgusting, and the repercussions are still being felt. The last federally funded residential school closed in 1997. And systemic racism means anyone of FN heritage is often relegated in the public mind to being drunks, drug addicts and leeches on society. But point to any group of people ripped from their family, raped and abused, had their language and culture beaten out of them, for 200 years...and see if they have no difficulty "integrating with society" no drug or alcohol abuse issues, no self hatred.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

We're polite because we have to be. We started inventing war crimes because we heard a rumour that the Germans may have crucified a guy. Our national sport regards fist fights as a reasonable response to minor infractions. If we weren't polite, we wouldn't be able to have a functioning society. It tends to get softies like Trump confused.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 19 hours ago

Kindness often gets mistaken for weakness by bullies

[–] [email protected] 23 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

He really just needs a good punch in the mouth.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 18 hours ago

with a curling stone

[–] [email protected] 42 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

As far as I'm concerned I will never trust the US again, and will avoid sending any fucking dime in their economy. Never.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Not that I’m against this idea, I just don’t think we can appreciate how difficult and time consuming it would be to not give them any money. Like you would be spending so much time researching products and even then you can’t be sure that somewhere in the supply chain isn’t American.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 hours ago

Well, you can always make a point of buying direct from China. That isn't necessarily better, but it does greatly lessen the chances of Americans in the supply chain.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 19 hours ago

Good, fuckin hit us where it hurts (money) and show dipshit why you don't start tariff wars.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 17 hours ago

Half of us voted for the other old guy, just sayin

[–] [email protected] 8 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

~~Trump te faire encule~~

Trump mon ostie de tache de marde va donc jouer sua ligne jaune une petite heure câlisse de Crisse d’imbécile. Pis crisse nous patience tabarnak.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Nice try, this Québécois appreciate the gesture. Now let me help you: Trump mon ostie de tache de marde va donc jouer sua ligne jaune une petite heure câlisse de Crisse d'imbécile. Pis crisse nous patience tabarnak.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 17 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Is it considered cheating if I were to use https://lorembarnak.com/ ?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 17 hours ago

I don't think it would be cheating, it sa very good use of technology.