this post was submitted on 03 Dec 2024
20 points (68.5% liked)

Ask Lemmy

27513 readers
1206 users here now

A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions


Rules: (interactive)


1) Be nice and; have funDoxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them


2) All posts must end with a '?'This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?


3) No spamPlease do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.


4) NSFW is okay, within reasonJust remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either [email protected] or [email protected]. NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].


5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions. If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email [email protected]. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.


6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try [email protected] or [email protected]


Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.

Partnered Communities:

Tech Support

No Stupid Questions

You Should Know

Reddit

Jokes

Ask Ouija


Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu


founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

One of my new friends is/was a cop. Just found out about it. I genuinely believe ACAB, and this news has me conflicted because my new friend seems really cool and super nice. I don't know him super well yet, though. He's a big part of this new friend group and I don't know how to process this and how to deal with the fact he's a cop.

I don't want to look past the fact he's a cop, but I want to stay his friend and stay in this friend group.

Any advice for dealing with this shit?

I can't talk to my therapist about it until Thursday.

(page 2) 38 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Those of you who know me here know I have an interest in sovereign citizens. I'm in a make fun of sovcits group on Facebook, and this one guy I talked to a lot added me as a friend, no big deal, but then he messaged me to tell me he's a cop in Australia and that he runs into them while working a lot. I think Australian police are likely of higher quality than American police, but I'm still using filters on FB posts.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

One of my cousins is a cop, but I don't believe ACA literally B so given he's generally a good guy I'd like to assume he's a force for good in the department.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I have cops that are friends and they aren't bad as far as I know.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago

that you know of. guarantee they're dirty or know dirty cops and don't do anything about it.

commissioner Gordon is fictional

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago

Talk to him and if he turns out to be a douche then stop and tell him to fuck off. NGL The Chance for him being a douche is higher because of his Job, but maybe he is not.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Its never the people, its a system. Currently we have a system that allows for unqualified and even violent people in the police force, with little accountability. There are still those who join in good faith to serve and protect their community. Unfortunately it seems like they are becoming a slimmer and slimmer minority, but they are still prominent.

I wouldn't mindlessly hate your local police force until ypu have a reason to hate them. Police aren't some hivemind. I live in a small town and the local police are super chill.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Some people just have shitty jobs. That's not a necessarily a judgement of them as an individual, it just a fact that they have a shitty job.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago

Like the Nazis.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Every perfect rule has only 1 exception.

If you meet another "good one" know that one of em is lying to you.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

ACAB but some individuals can be cool enough. Just know they could turn on you easier than others.

My landlord is a cop, but he’s also a decent guy. To me. I try to bring up liberal talking points on the sly to at least expose him to alternate opinions. He’s not against them, so that’s good.

It’s hard. I kinda have to have a mental block up against the individual’s career choice, because he’s not one of the 100% asshole / racist / fully bastard cops. I know / knew some of them too, and I won’t give them the time of day once the convo showed their true colors (which, happens within an hour or less usually).

I guess they’re comfortable showing their true colors to me over a beer because we …look the same. Gross.

But, know that if it hasn’t already happened, there’s probably some humanity left in them.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

A cop AND a landlord! That guy is really going all in on being a scumbag, does he moonlight as a debt collector?

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 month ago

My brother is a cop, and we're still close despite a mutual understanding that we will become lethal opponents should relevant violence break out in our area (civil war/insurrection/significant rioting).

I think our willingness to do that allows us to overlook our differences until that situation were to arise. I imagine we'd both see that as a defining opportunity for the other to 'defect' and, until then, we can look past associating with a BagGuy^TM

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago

Being a cop doesnt make you an asshole. Nazis were friendly with each other and many even had jewish and foreigner friends. The job is whats the problem and unfortunately its part of a persons identity. Every person has subjectively good and bad sides, you have to decide how heavily each weighs

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago

Is this person a new friend? Or is this person a cop. Getting to know someone and becoming friends with that person is a relationship. Deciding this person is horrid because they are a cop is superficial. And that person will never be your friend, there is no relationship there. Is this person a Human you want to get to know, or a job title you hate.

[–] [email protected] -4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

One of my friends is a veteran. I be sure to tell him my thoughts on his deployment in Afghanistan and I've told him multiple times he deserves his PTSD.

But I still love that man as a human and a friend. We get along together, we laugh, I call him a terrible person, and life continues.

Basically, don't change your beliefs based on who you're with, and it's fine to be friends with a cop. I have other friends who are terrible human beings as well, but they make up for it with other great qualities. If anything, being friends with a PoS is the best way to make them a better person; you really have an opportunity to help society.

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›