mongrel archipelago of mayonnaise-filled peasants

Oh yeah!

that's what English would look like if we fixed the fucking spelling

Holy shit!

that's what English would look like if we fixed the fucking spelling. They look at French's oodles of rules that all matter

Can't we just use the Finnish rule of "each letter is only pronounced one way ever" and solve all the headaches?

My favorite version of what you just did is "English is tough; it can be understood through thorough thought, though."

You missed the opportunity to throw "thorough" in there after "through".

there is no understanding, just repetition of what you've heard

it is, but “hiccup” is the original spelling despite people claiming otherwise

There's an interesting history behind why colonel is spelled and pronounced how it is...

https://www.deseret.com/1996/8/4/19258272/french-italian-roots-explain-why-colonel-has-an-r-sound

To investigate that question, we have to go back a little further into the word's history. The French word "coronel" is derived from the Italian word "colonnello." When the French borrowed the word, however, they found it difficult to pronounce. In an effort to ease the pronunciation problem, they changed the first "l" sound to an "r" sound. This is quite a common occurrence; when there are two "l" sounds or two "r" sounds near each other in a word, one of them is frequently omitted or changed to a different sound to eliminate a tricky pronunciation. Linguists call this type of alteration "dissimilation."

When English later adopted the word (in the 16th century), the French pronunciation was kept, but the letter "r" was changed back to an "l," making the term look more like the original Italian word and producing the conflict we continue to have between spelling and pronunciation.

and lieutenant in British English.

I'm gonna have to put anyone who spells it this way into the morgue if they keep it up tbh

'tis what happens when you staple nahuatl et al onto spanish

I guess they didn't learn from ~~Lead~~ Led Zeppelin

Same and in most situations I can pass as an English first speaker.

I was at IKEA buying a bed frame and asked the person at the counter if she had put the slats on the bill... But I pronounced it like slates because I was sure I had seen an "e" at the end of the word and there went the illusion 🤷

There's also "English is a stupid language" which focuses on word constructions instead of pronunciation

Lol. Spoken and written French are so different they’re basically two different languages…

Man French was so difficult for my brain to parse. The word genders felt so silly/arbitrary that it never stuck, which is hilarious given the context of ... English, but omfg did it not gel with me.

just learn chinese

To answer your question: You'd have to have ligatures for every single word in existence so that is not possible.

I wonder what character set would work best for writing the English language. I'm legitimately thinking Korean could handle it better than the latin alphabet