A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
The most frustrating thing about things like this is how seemingly most people dont learn.
Like getting suckered or being wrong once, fine, maybe. But I feel like people just double down instead of dealing with the mildly uncomfortable moment of admitting fault.
Not only not admitting fault but somehow making it the fault of the very people that told them exactly what would happen.
Don't put your hand in the fire, johnny, it'll hurt. johnny stares you in the eye as he puts his hand defiantly into the fire Ooooow, it burns! Why did you make it burn me?!?
You push Johnny into the fire.
Worse: a generation can learn and then forget. Boomers learned first hand how bad war was when they were being sent off as bullet sponges to Vietnam, Cambodia, and Korea. They conveniently forgot all of it when it came time for their kids to go.
I just finished reading Harry Potter 4, goblet of fire to my kid. The last chapter, despite all the evidence and good people telling him Voldemort has returned and (spoiler after 20 years?) killed Cedric, etc. the minister of magic, Fudge, struggles mightily against their statements and eventually, instead of admitting the truth and accepting what he must do, decides to make enemies of those who wield the truth to shelter himself from the discomfort, fear and pain and decides to pretend Voldemort isn't real. It's a pivotal moment in the series and one that sets the tone for the rest of the books, the very adult/political/media battles of the mind, perceptions, and propaganda...by a leader who was a good person overall I think but couldn't face the music.
I was explaining to my kid that sometimes people just want to avoid reality, and when they are in important roles, it can be devastating. I also told her all people have the same instinct, to avoid conflict, pain and discomfort, but that by learning to go through it you realize it's far better than the alternatives.
sometimes people just want to avoid reality
This is what I have accepted in the last 5 or so years. No matter how much information I can provide about climate change, people just brush it off like it doesn't matter.
It's a defense mechanism. When you think about the amount of things they would have to learn and change their mind on, and then weigh those against "do whats easy", it's not surprising people change their minds less as they age.
Fudge specifically says how terrible it would be to upset the order and calm that has been built in Voldemorts absence. Keeping his safe place is his priority.
admitting fault
I have a working hypothesis that the dumber and more insecure you are, the less likely you are to admit that 'I was wrrrr'.... ...that 'I made a misttt'.....
You see?
Anecdotal, but the evidence so far is persuasive.
They care more about being sure than being right.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice…ehh..well, can’t be fooled again!
Hmmm, is this just human nature at work? Is it a function of the conservative mind like it’s never their fault?
Actually... yes, it literally is. They focus on what is effective, and if the pushy behavior works for them to get what they want, they do it. And it does. So they do.
The right wing the world over is in for a lot of this. Like shitting the bed and then just rolling around in it and going "no i didn't"
They never will admit they were wrong. It's like climate change. We've been saying we need to do something since the 70s and they've been denying reality since.
Now we're on to the "it's too late to do anything" stage of conservative thinking.
There are still Brexiteers won't admit they were wrong and doubles down, calling Remainers as Remoaners, in spite of recent surveys stating 56% of British now would not want leave but return instead. Of course, why wouldn't the Brexiteers admit it? They don't want to hurt their own ego by admitting errors. They'd rather hurt the national ego instead.
Only 56%?
Yeah that sounds like a 7% raise since the brexit vote, I would have guessed that far more people would have changed their minds since then
Yeah I'm not even gonna take note until it's like >80%.
Brexiters are always annoyed.
It's not by chance that the word "Gammon" became a common way to describe them (because of the color of that kind of ham is a pretty good match for the color of the furious-face on a pale white old man or woman)
Let's face it we're a bunch of apes, a few are intelligent and functioning, and it's a miracle anything works at all.
At least that makes me feel better because it just makes me happy when anything works at all.
Okay but we need to do better or literally everyone dies to climate change, right? So...
Let's see what happens
Yes. Let's wait and see until theres no options left!
FYI I'm quite active in that arena personally. I just meant in a big picture way like let's see if humans get through this filter.
We need to free ourselves from some of the classes who will absolutely not be making it through any filters, if we want to do that, and I don't think shitty Jeff is going to settle for 'aging beach himbo who can run the fuck out of a spreadsheet and power game your tabletop group to ruin'
Exactly. No point in worrying if there's nothing we can do about it anyway!
And this doesn't count as suicide, becausebim pretending its not happening! Its perfect!
The sad thing is that we won't just die to climate change, but everything becomes way more hellish than it already is, to the point where we'd wish we had just died...
Yeah it won't be the gentle 20th century 'sirens and then two hours later everyone suddenly stops existing' apocalypse. It will be brutal and horrible and show us the worst we can be. Everybody with die-by thousands, by dozens, one by one.
But, like, can't stop line go up, so...
Is that what you want? cause that’s what’ll happen
As if they were even paying attention to anything beyond their sphere of bigotry.
Their British they're not the smartest bunch, make great motorcycles though!
My dad had a Royal Enfield back in the 60s. He said it had the worst electrical system he ever had to deal with.
I don't think any motorcycle had a decent electrical system back then.
In a country that has as much rain as England, your motorcycles should probably be capable of not shorting out when it rains.
Fun fact: Royal Enfield is now an Indian company. They even have their cult of fanboys here. They consider these bikes are to be a symbol of manliness.
We have a normal mix.
Brexit was one of the first times that the idiots moved in both force and sync however. It didn't help that most of our media has been captured by right leaning rich gits. We are still reeling from the fall of the independent BBC.
The British Brexiters are not as stupid at Contemporary American Republicans, but they do come close.
as a brit, I think back on all the people I grew up with, my home town, people I knew and I truly believe in my heart of hearts that there are some dumb motherfuckers out there in ol Blighty
At least half of everyone is below average. The problem is that the bell curve is flattening and the stupid people are able to network and create their own little groups. They become unaware of their own ignorance because they keep getting positive feedback to fuel their negativity.
We all gave to be aware of this and not let it happen to us. The old saying, “keep an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out”.
At least half of everyone is below ~~average~~ the median.
Thankyou, you are correct.
Average is an ambiguous term; mean, modal or median is much more precise. Unfortunately, those who are at or below the median are ignorant of the distinction.
It is however, a term that a Brexiter can understand.
I think of them atleast as stupid but not more.
Eh. They just have farther to go.
*They're