this post was submitted on 02 Mar 2024
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[–] [email protected] 41 points 9 months ago (2 children)

“‘The data is clear. And that data is telling us the heaviest animal to ever walk this earth still remains yo momma.”

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Oh yeah? Well yo momma so fat she got smaller fat people orbiting around her.

(Wait, are we doing snaps?)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Yo momma so fat, when walmart wants to lower prices they have her sit on the roof.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

Ah, that reminds me about this Day9 classic about Graham's Number.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Edit: Damnit somebody already beat me to the yo momma joke.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'll still laugh if you tell it to me. Go ahead.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

The reason the scientists were studying ancient whales in the first place is because the scientist couldn’t get your mom off his mind.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

That's pretty good! That reminds me of the time the editor at the magazine where I used to work asked me the difference between a whale and my mom: about 200lbs and a black dress.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

There’s another one in there about a being an ancient whale and you let that slip too.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's pretty amazing that as huge and awesome as creatures in the past were, probably the biggest living thing ever is alive right now.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

biggest living thing

Animal.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Largest_organisms

When considering singular entities, the largest organisms are clonal colonies which can spread over large areas. Pando, a clonal colony of the quaking aspen tree, is widely considered to be the largest such organism by mass.[1]

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

probably the biggest living thing ever is alive right now.

So they're technically correct.

Just not in the way they meant to be.