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What are your best intrusive ads ideas? (lemm.ee)

submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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If your job was to come up with greater enshittification for society, what would you do?

My ideas:

Rental apartments where every wall has a screen with ads 24/7. You can pay cheaper rent to live with ads in every wall or you can pay a monthly subscription to turn off the ads (you don't get to use the screens for anything else tho). After people get used to it we can start adding a little bit of ads even for the subscription users, just a little less.
Movie theaters. This one is obvious, why did anyone think it was ok to give people access to uninterrupted movies just because they paid a couple bucks? We should include some ads in the middle of movies in the cinema duh.
Water and electricity. Private utility providers should be able to require you to watch a certain amount of ads on their apps in order to deliver their services to you every month (you still also pay normally ofc).
Alarm clocks. Smartphones should delete the option to pick a custom sound for alarm and instead wake you up with loud ads. Installing any custom alarm app should require root and we should lobby government to ban devices with alarm clocks which are not smart.
Unified ad-watching score. Similar to credit score, you will gain points by not skipping ads, having the selfie camera turned on while watching an ad (to make sure you looking), having the microphone on to make sure it isn't muted, etc. Every platform contributes to your score. They can use your ad-watching score to give you benefits or punish you as they please.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago

You have to watch an ad to crank your car.

Every time you bring your car to a full stop while it is running, an ad plays through your audio system and displays on your radio.

You have to watch an ad to make a phone call.

When your phone rings, it plays an ad jingle, call JG Wentworth 877 cash now.

When you send a text message or write a text post to an online system, an ad is injected with your text post so that readers in order to read what you wrote also have to read the ad.

If you have Smart lights or anything smart in your home, in order to use it you have to watch an ad.

In order to pay for something with a credit card you have to watch an ad on the credit card machine and click one of the choices that are offered to you.

Smart pillows that play hypnotic ads at you in your sleep.

Your electric toothbrush requires an ad to be played the whole time it is being used, and if you brush your teeth for less than the length of the ad, then they take a dollar from you.

Some guy comes to your house and screams logos and add quotes at you all of the time. If you try to get him to shut up he murders you and your entire family.

Replace the guy with a robot.