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While it seemed like a fun prank at the time, I realize my prank fire extinguishers full of leaded gasoline were a mistake.
this post was submitted on 07 May 2024
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Excuse me, what about pizza in squares?
I guess because there is no crust to grab. Gotta get grease and maybe sauce on your hands to eat the inner squares.
But square pizza is the sort you eat with fork and knive tho?
Not necesarilly. I fear we have to face it: This is one of the rare cases where xkcd fucked it up.
https://youtu.be/Oc9Wigm_kCE?si=AIaUu9123D9k4kGB&t=343
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pizza_al_taglio
Not at all, they are probably talking about horrible Dayton Style pizza. For when you want pizza but it needs to be thin, unsatisfying, greasy, and difficult to eat.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dayton-style_pizza
Fucking heathens, if it weren't for them keeping keeping the alien technology from area 51 at Wright Patterson AFB I'd have them wiped off the map.
This is the superior thin crust style of pizza. Cut in squares, which is a totally fine and legitimate thing to do.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St._Louis%E2%80%93style_pizza
Do people actually eat this?
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/04/Marion%27s_Supreme.JPG
I only had New York style pizza in the US and thought the US pizza game isn't that bad.
People who eat Dayton-style pizza are like the city of Dayton itself—smelly inside and bereft of true purpose. Those of us in the US who haven't been so psychically damaged wouldn't eat that shit.
(I'm only just learning about the disgusting gutter pizza. I don't like Dayton because my last company was slowly destroyed over several years by a company that was headquartered in Dayton. I associate the city with the asshole who was CEO. Fuck you, Chris! I've heard Dayton is, at worst, not great, so take my comment as the joke it is.)
Hard to believe but they do. Note the blackened edges to make it even worse. It isn't a nice char like you get with Neapolitan, or even the seared cheese you get with a good Detroit or Pan, it's just burnt.
There are many American pizzas that are great, Chicago deep dish, NY, Detroit, on and on, Dayton style is not one of them.
Yes, and well-made crust like this is delicious.
Unfortunately lots of it isn't great
There is no pizza acceptable to eat with fork and knife.
That's a misnamed quiche.
Tomato soup in a bread bowl, with cheese. Not quiche, the filling isn't egg-based.
It's delicious. And since the Italians call just about any round bread with toppings pizza (e.g. Bartolomeo Scappi's pizza was cake with powdered sugar & saffron toppings) it's pizza. As is New England clam chowder in a bread bowl!
Pizza with zucchini and champignons. Vegetables pizza in short.
Any pizza that requires utensils is not pizza.
As a fork-and-knife pizza eater, I have come around to pizza squares.
That said, PIZZA BELONGS IN A TRIANGLE
This can be solved by using a napkin
(Or just not caring about the problem anyhow)
Or by cutting it into standard slices. But yeah napkins and apathy work too.
If the pizza is a square or rectangle (like Detroit deep dish or a flatbread) it is on, but round pizza cut in squares is just bad
The only correct way to cut (not too gigantic) round pizza is into six parts so you get equilateral triangles (well, modulo a curved section) which is ideal for holding.
Home-made pizza rarely if ever is round, though, in which you probably don't want to go for squares but eyeball some appropriately-sized rectangles.