this post was submitted on 12 Jan 2024
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difference between a statement and a complaint? (lemmy.world)
submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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What is the difference between a complaint and a statement? If theres anyone with a better set of social skills here to help a dude out lol

Ie when you're chilling watching TV and somebody asks you to go out, but you respond with no thanks, I'm tired. Would stating you're tired be considered a complaint?

Just had a similar action with an NT friend, who says I complain about being tired a lot. When I look back and I never bring it up unprompted, and they comment on my mood so i tell them whats up.. is there some social thing which simply stating you feel negative is seen as a complaint?

Edit: thanks so much for all the comments! I should have been more specific, the examples I gave were not my actual experiences. In fact if I were to be more specific, it's my roommate that made me think about this, and they never want to go out lol. But I can still gain some insight from the comments! But it was much more generalized. Actual interaction: we are going about our day and my roommate casually asks "hey how are ya" and I respond "a bit tired!" And they remark on how I complain about being tired a lot. Which surprised me because I was answering their question, and not getting long winded into it. Then it dawned on me maybe simply stating I feel negative is seen as a complaint by people. Iunno.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago

Asking if you want to do something, like going out, is something that takes some effort for your friend and is something they do because they want to be doing these things with you. When you reply 'no, I'm tired', it is a statement, but if this happens a lot, I think your friend may get a bit upset. Their effort of asking was for nothing, and they did not get to do the things that they wanted to do with you. They may not actually think you explicitly complain about being tired, but rather it is a reaction to their frustration of not getting what they want (regarding this issue) out of the friendship with you. Does that make sense?