this post was submitted on 27 Dec 2023
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You just need some practice farting quietly.
The sound is much less important than the smell.
if no one can hear you fart, no one knows who is responsible
That's not correct. We all know that first to smell it, dealt it.
This is generally true except in the controversial case of "he who denied it supplied it" which set a new precedent for fart identification worldwide
Such is the jurisprudence, yes.
guilty dog barks first
Yes they do. All body smells contain the personal note of the person. Someone with a skilled nose can identify you by any bodily odor.
The people sitting next to me would know.
well, you have to learn to employ different techniques like crop dusting
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=crop+dusting
"You smelled it you dealt it" kept everyone quite when I was in school so long as there is plausible deniability for the source.
Don't start nutn, won't be nutn
Sure thing Sloppy Diffuser, sure thing